Something to Rely On
by Formerly-ForlornShadowlily009
Summary: Yuki is a vampire trapped with the human emotions of regret. Shuichi's just the prey. Vampire fic, AU. R&R. This is FORLORNSHADOWLILY009!only my penname has changed. ALL MY STORIES are being reposted so please review!
1. Chapter 1

I'm Getting Older, I Need Somewhere to Begin.

Disclaimer. I own nothing but this story and its entire creativeness.

Warnings adult themes, AU, Angst.

Hey everyone. Well there's not much to say about this story except this is my first vampire fic and AU story. So I'm bare with me and let me know if it's any good. Please Read and enjoy.

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They say when you die….your life flashes before your eyes. Every second, every instant, every breath that was recorded into your memories is replayed. Time rewinds itself and all of our faults are brought to the surface to be viewed. Things that we didn't do, wishes and hopes that are half fulfilled. As the life drains from your body, the blood flowing to meet the earth, your mind fills with anguish and all hope is lost. Our souls are trapped in that moment and the pain remains crushing with cold warmth of the eternal night. When we die the only thing to be expected is sharp, asphyxiated regret. Gie in to the regret and nothing is left except the hollowness.

Self damnation, bitter, a lingering sour that creeps along your spine like sweat.

When I died….there was no movie for me to see. No tears to be spilt, no emotion to experience.

Shatter my flesh, and i'll show you what's inside. A sneaking peek into the void.

All that was there was the inky, black obscurity. The cold frost offered from the twilight's kiss breathed into my body and replaced what once called life. The darkness pulled at my soul untill it was ripped from my body and cast into a place that holds no name. Icy touches burned my flesh and charred me to the bone as a new life was infused into my nervous system. Pain became unmeasurable, superimposed and melting into the whitewash of it all. Chains now where constricted upon my limbs. Invisible bindings that draped across me like scars. They screamed their name and forced my ears to listen to the sound they created. I was now bound, forced into servitude. My once now proud will became broken. I now was subjugated to the night, my master, my sire, my only enmity.

Warmth, I want it. Desire, I crave it. Life, I abhor it. Sin, I'm swallowed in the tidal wave of its embrace.

When I died….pain was not an option. However, being reborn had its costs. The blood that once flowed through my veins dried up, shriveling away to become powder in the wind. Such a hunger that drives to me replace what was lost. Now my lips are drenched in its staining color, marking my pale skin, and sending a message to everything with eyes. I savor its taste as it flows into my mouth. The metallically piquancy, it rejuvenates my taste buds as the thirst over takes my senses and for one split second all absoluteness melts and merges into one. It's consuming, and its addiction wields a high greater than any nirvana. It washes over my teeth and coats every inanimate cell with it fraudulent illusions.

Blood…life…my testament to damnation.

I have found myself lost to its power as victim after victim falls from my kiss. Insatiable can never describe the sensation of just one drop being licked from frozen lips. Madness, insanity, such words are common and barely hold meaning as I have transcended to a level higher than any label can offer. Now with no mind set to abide by, I have reverted back to the simplest of carnal instincts with a forced calculated and studious glaze. Questioning has become a favorite past time as I spend hours in the twilights basking glow and observe the world around me.

Watching the humans that remain trapped in the sensations of regret and the emotions brought about by a thing called a conscious is truly amusing. Like a specimen under a microscope every action they make is watched by me. These are the creatures that claim to hold the key to power, the throne to strength. When in all reality they are trapped in nothing more than regret and silly concepts. Concepts that when you die your life is has a chanced to be viewed once again. That when you pass from this world a god is waiting for you. The silly concept that warmth is truly real, and not just a fabrication created by our desires because we want nothing more than to be accepted. To be abolished from sin, from regret, to be free. By doing so they can cast off the chains of the night and sore into the sun's burning rays. Wanting, hoping, and wishing….all created by our desires to become clean. Thus making them all worthless and unachievable in the end. The mere thought that we have a purpose, a right, a sense of belonging...laughable.

When I died my life did not flash before my eyes, but to say that I have never experienced this act would be committing the greatest sin imaginable. Lost in the burning brightness of the light I sleep, and when I sleep the dreams come. Every day my life is replayed before me in my nightmares and I watch as I become of the specimens under the microscope. My hopes, my achievements, my failures. I was nothing more than a human wrapped up in silly concepts. But that was then and this is now. Now I am a creature of the night, stalking the world that I once was a part in. Taking part in my revenge against the mind-set that forced me to become what I am. For in the end, when I glance at myself, my frozen limbs, and blood stained lips….I am forced to relive my dreams.

I had a life once, a name, a future. Now all i hold is a past and permaneant fixture in the never ending present. I have no right, no quest except to exist and to exist with a sense of power. For if i am to live forever, doomed to relive the same sunset, and then i will have to find a way to supress my dreams. For if i don't, then I am caught up in nothing more than hated sharp, asphyxiated regret.

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Okay that's chapter one, tell me you love it or hate it. Should I continue or stop write now? Anyway I hope you enjoy this please read and review!


	2. Chapter 2 and 3

Chapter 2 Endless Whispers in the Night; Silent Screams in the Day

Disclaimer. I own nothing but this story and its creativeness

Warnings mature themes, Angst. AU. Vamp. Fic

To Devils-Advocate3 thank you so much! wow that was an awesome review! yes shuichi will have a igger part but not till later. you'll just have to wait and see. wink. anyway thanks so much! for a writer's dream in a reader!

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Blood…. crimson red as the brightest wine, drips from my lips and falls slowly down to the crowd below. It mixes with the falling tears of the sky and slowly loses its permanent, staining color. I watch fascinated and disgusted all at the same time as its substance and entity is dissolved in heavens tears. Down, hundreds of feet it descends until it becomes nothing more than simple fraudulent water. A distortion of a perfect picture upon everything that is anything but whole.

All around my silent form, the heavens cry. Their screams echoing into the night as the darkness closes in and everything is swallowed in its presence. Below me the world carries on, its children naïve to everything around them as I sit perched on the roof of a building. My dark form meshes with the twilight's omnipresent hold and I sink into its embrace to be forgotten by all, to be unnoticed, to become obscure, to remain silent.

A feat that is anything but unfamiliar. I fear that i have gotten to good at hiding. I fear that someday i won't be able to escape from perch, my watchtower. Then again, what do i truly care for.

The icy breath of the twilight demands acknowledgment, as it covers everything, freezing it to the bone. With hollow eyes i watch as the humans cower and shiver as it's touch passes over them. They brush it off, briefly recognizing the feeling of numbness and continue with their average, humdrum actives. How disgustig, not to recognize its call. Ignoring the meaning that it represents, the very power that it holds.

I however must answer to its call, it chains. Numbness of a different kind, deep, and unfilling penetrates my soulless form and fills every inch of my inanimate skin. It's familiar yet foreign, disturbing my train of thoughts as it sweeps across me. If I still had a heart I would clutch at it and scream in unison with the falling tears from above.

But as I am dead, I remain silent and give in to all sensation. To truly be frozen, such a delicious sensation.

Silence…my life…my distant lover…it surrounds me and I worship its touch. The hollow wailing of the wind as it sweeps the land clean, the empty weeping noise created by the rain as it bombards the forsaken….my hated….all fall on death ears as I throw my head back. I letting everything become exposed, as I let the simple fraudulent water swallow me. I want it and therefore I am punished. Nothing can me reach me now, not the noise, not the freezing numbness, not even the hopes and foolish desires excreted by the population below. Its suffocating but I endure it as it is nothing more than familiar. In this new world that I have found myself thrust into, I am nothing more than a missing chest piece, a lost figure in the wind.

In the end though….it doesn't matter. When I was alive….I was still lost…still damned. Nothing has changed….except that life no longer fills me and I now have an eternity to waste on self loathing and hatred. Before my life was simple, created solely on routine and governed by simple concepts. I was alone and back then I hated it. Hated the crushing darkness that night brought, the loneliness. Yet still I pushed through each day, bathing in the suns rays and trying to achieve the simplest of my dreams. I became a writer when I grew older, shedding my child like naivety and gaining the eyes of an adult.

Yet even then I was destined to fail…to remain forgotten. I was always alone and sin followed me life a loyal dog. Numbness began to set in and I allowed it to take over. Allowed him to take over. Yuki….a man unlike anything I had ever seen. An enigma that I quickly became addicted to. I swayed from the path of the sun and followed him into the night, to the line that divides everything. With one simple wish I handed over everything and fought to remain sane as he consumed me.

All I ever wanted was to be noticed…to not be forgotten. I was a fool, an exact copy of the race that I now feast upon. An idiot blinded by all feeling and concept. Yuki saw that and showed me the error of my ways…driving me to deaths door he threw me through it and slammed it shut. Screams…pain…regret….all filled me for one brief second as my soul was torn from me. Casting it aside like a diseased object, Yuki gave me the recognition that I had so craved and threw me to night's feet with his life claiming kiss. As a servant of something larger, he did his job with precision and stripped me of my ideals, my concepts, and my very warmth. There are worse things than death and Kitazawa Yuki showed me everyone of them.

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Pale moonlight shines down upon the city, as the heavens have ceased their weeping, and the moon materializes to reign supreme in the barren, frozen sky. The bitter atmosphere created by the rain's departure takes it toll on everything it touches. Forcing one's lungs to close and restricting the life supporting essence of oxygen from entering the body. With its firm, yet invisible grasp it hinders breathing and brings it to nothing more than short, sharp intakes of air. Just another set of chains unknowing set upon the world, restrictions and limits that are blindly followed and stubbornly ignored. Bliss is ignorance, not realizing the obvious is the closest thing to perfection, and denying everything that doesn't fit into our perfect picture of the world is nothing more than a defence mechainism. With such swallow breathing the humans are infected by the cold, and are unknowingly brought closer to death's heavenly door. With a shadow eclipsing their hearts, they walk blindly in its path. That is, until the sun rise and destroys everything that the dark has placed upon them for one evening. It's suffocating and I love to watch it every damn night.

With an eternity to waste, I have nothing to do but look down upon the world from my invisible perch. Desire….the longing…. it tries to seep into me as I graze at the streets and remember everything from a dead man eyes. To be condemned to merely watch, to be restricted from reaching out, and grasping something that was once yours, it's sickening. A burning is created in the hollow cavern of my chest and i spend hours clutching at it like a forlorn lover holding a dying rose.

They say that when you die you have nothing to lose and nothing to gain from the experience. A deadly stalemate. Just another simple concept that humans have foolishly created. To give something a name, to give it a label, a purpose, is too invoke power. By creating such ideals they feed the ever hungry dark and strengthen its hold on creation. By doing this they take darkness into there hearts and let it bury deep within them. Letting it lay dormant till their sins and pain are exposed and then it strikes, ending all thought and existence. Maybe that is what has happened to me, maybe that is the reason for all.

When I was still alive, still part of the glowing sun bathed realm of the living, I longed to be recognized and at the same time….forgotten. Even though that was my one deepest fear, I still wished to be swallowed whole. Because therefore… even if I was forgotten…cast aside…I would still have a purpose. To be one of the forsaken. I have achieved my fear…and I hate every second of it with loving, deep seeded loathing.

"What was it," I ask myself, "that made me the way I am…the way I was."

I was abused, starved from affection and the stupid ugly ideal of love. I was neglected from everything. Left to pick myself up after my world was shattered time and time again. With a smothering consuming fire in my numb heart I faced the world and became an exact copy of everything I hated. Everything I wished to destroy….and I lived in it all. Longing for one touch of something that would fill my dismal world and complete me.

Perhaps that was it….the masks that I put on…the deceptions to everything. Perhaps that was what attracted Yuki to me. You can hide from everything and everyone….but the dark will always know you. To lie to it is something unachievable even by a god's standards. That was what he taught me of course. What he burned into my mind and craved into my flesh. He taught me to worship the thing that had taken the life from my body. The thing that had banished me from the realm of the normal. He taught me to hate myself even more….and to hate him as well. He taught me to long to be forgotten.

It rained the night I killed him. That is, if you can call it that. When you die nothing remains except an imprint of your formal self. Thoughts, speech, smell….ect. it all becomes marked into your cold skin. A soul is no more and everything seems to stop, time stands still, and never resumes. When I killed the man I had come to love with a hated passion, I released his mind and sent it falling into the darkness to meet his soul. His eyes stared up at me, cold and lifeless, just like the first time he had fallen from grace. No looks of surprise mirrored his face as he knew that I dreamed of nothing more than silencing him. To make my life an undead hell was his mission, and he did it with precision. "Dying is an art form, a means of self release and survival." he whispered to me once. Long before i stopped caring and became numb. How grotesquely correct he was.

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That's it for now, a little cliff hanger and a small chapter to hook you even more. So far all I can say is that I love writing this story and will try to update as soon as possible. So please read, review, and enjoy!


	3. Chapter 4

Chapter 3

Brushing off the Pain We only Usher it into Our Hearts.

Thak you for my one loyal reviewer i shall continue to update! thanks for the support.

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Take a photograph, it will be the last.

Nothing can hold you here.

Not a simple chain for plea can ever make you change.

Heaven screams in pain

Making everything become engrossed in shame

Leave me now and I know I might survive, because

Pain is internal, and everything is right were it belongs.

Grasp my hand I know we will always be in heaven's hell

Take a photograph; nothing will ever be the same.

Not a memory or silent plea can ever make you change.

And so I scream in vain

"To lie right in front of you"

Is everything i wanted to do

And so I scream in vain, "nothing I can do to change"

Grasp my hand I know we will always be in heaven's hell

The warmth of the frozen night

The screams that it emits, shattering glass and your skin

Does it pull you down?

To be forsaken is your only wish

Take my hand and I know it won't be alright

Take a photograph, it will be the best

Nothing remains the same,

Not a simple chain or plea can ever be the same

Blood flows from the sky

And all you can do is cry

Grasp my hand again or else….

Take a photograph, it will be the last

Nothing left to hold you down……

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Time….minutes….seconds….these things have escaped me. I lay here in the basking glow of the night, and drift through time with not ever knowing what it is. When one has an eternity waste, such trivial things are useless. A year….a decade….a millennia….all could pass with out me even grasping its presence. One hundred and twenty-five such years have past since I left my soul behind and was chained. I hardly care and noting it would only ensure chaos of the mind. One hundred and twenty-five years have past and yet my body has somehow managed to evade its crushing touches. Flawless skin, perfect senses, and everything else. Marvel at me from behid closed blinds and i shall appear to be perfection.Features that would make humans sell their souls just to get a glimpse at. Just like other things denied to me, perfect health floats among them. When one is dead you can't really call yourself healthy just unattainable.

Vanity….if you died would you miss such a luscious sin. Spending hours in front of a mirror, polluting everything around you just to achieve the perfect look. Wasting away your life in hopes of approval from frivolous individuals are such things that this immorality offers. A reflection….a mark on the world….a signature….all these things have been stripped from me. To look at my appearance in a pristine, looking glass would only ensure boredom.

A flicker, a mirage, even one stray glimpse.

I earn for such an act. However logic defies me. Why waste your time looking for something that has been erased. No image appears to me when I turn myself to face it….nothing is shown except the ever present background. To be forgotten even by a simple object is the gift that death presents to you. The only way to fix it is to strike back at everything that has ignored your presence.

Break the glass and see what lies beneath it.

Feasting upon the lower animals, ripping the life supporting essence from their bodies, it presents a high equal to the sin of vanity. Drenched lips and glazed soulless eyes, how I long to see that image reflected in smooth untainted glass. Unreachable and unattainable….such words are washed away as I invoke my power and sweep everything away that plagues me. The thrill of one high-pitched scream, the feel of claret, colored blood running across my frozen skin, the thumping of a heart as it beats one last time before giving into the night…..it produces a high that makes a creature want to scream in pure mind blowing ecstasy. It's perfect, with the world crumbling at your feet and the sun trembling at your presence.

Quiver before me as i cry to my alter ego, i have nothing left after all.

Everything seems to take on an air unsettled peace. The perfect sensation. But that too is just ways to past the ever present eternity. Late at night when the moon is contained in the sky, I find myself drifting. I left everything go, and thus I sit and questioned everything around me. As I ponder I quickly begin to grow bored with my existence. Preying upon creatures clearly lower than me has become tedious and unattractive. The once thrilling bliss-induced sensation of coppery, laced blood now escapes my fancy. I fallen from my perch built on hatred and supremacy down to the lowly stoop built by humanity. When I lose interest in everything around me, I am left with myself, with my thoughts, with simple concepts. I begin to feel sympathy for the human creatures that I co-exist with. Once again I begin to see with their eyes, and slowly I am sucked back into the caged torment that was my life. When this happens, I lose control of the mask the night has shackled onto me, and begin to feel, to reflect.

I deplore this. Detest it with a heated vengeance that sparks a fire in my dead heart! My veins warm with a passion that should never be allowed to exist within me and I tremble in fury. I am ashamed at these sensations, angered that I am still weak enough to possess them, and compelled to welcome them into me. It's human…it's a reminder… it's weak.

And as I sit lost in myself, I am filled with memories of the man I slaughtered. The very vampire which once upon a time like a cliche novel I was hopelessly infatuated with. A creature that I had exposed myself to completely. Nothing was ever hidden, nothing was false. Yuki saw straight through me. He taught me everything, forced my eyes open to the world. To its faults, to mine. It didn't matter that I wanted to pretend that I was content with myself and the life I tried to live. Nothing was my choice. Yuki made that clear, and before the sickening sweet night could seek its fangs into me, he did. Taking control of my soul and shredding it. He made me scream in awakened pain as I grabbed onto him like a leech. I wanted him, wanted what he offered, and he played with me.

Vampires are cruel creatures, immune to foolish emotions….or least they are supposed to be. Yuki was a perfect monster, the ideal definition of darkness, skillful, and mind controlling. As he toyed with me, letting me think that I was falling in love, he twisted my thoughts and crushed me... suffocation to the greatest degree. He bound me to him, letting me become swallowed in self loathing as I willingly became his servant. As soon as this took place, pushed me closer to want I am today. That was why I made the decision to silence him. My first killing, my first step into the darkened world in which I was reborn in. With no regrets or after thoughts I left his body lying in the rain. The water washing away is tainted, stale blood until it became nothing more than simple, fraudulent water.

Perhaps that was why I have lost myself once again. The fact that I felt no regret. Now it has come back to condemn me even more….its only human after all. There are worse things than death, and to be dead and still possessing feelings of remorse… is it.

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_I walked across an empty land_

_Knew the pathway like the back of my hand_

_I felt the earth beneath my feet_

_Sat by the river and it made me complete_

_Oh simple thing where have you gone_

_I'm getting old and I need something to rely on_

_So tell me when you're gonna let me in_

_I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin_

Soft, sultry, hypnotizing….

The words floated through the calm air and rose. Drifting on the wind and meshing with the dark. Singing, the sweet sound of a human voice, makes it way to me as I lay flat against concrete. The stars have free reign in the sky as I lay chained to the roof of a building, captured by the simple harmony that echoes to meet the moon. It penetrates my mind and makes me dizzy. I spin from my stationary perch until the stars become one blaring background of white. Slowly my mind clears and I begin to question.

I can taste the words in my mouth, lingering on my tongue. They are as succulent as blood and just as captivating. The nonexistent taste cause me to lick my lips, my cold saliva coating the strips of flesh as my mind play with their meaning. I am sure that if I still had a soul, I would be experiencing the sensation of being moved. However, as I have none, I convince myself that I am not bewitched. Just….tired from being imprisoned and worn from feasting in the moonlight. It was nit a strange sound really, the voice if a humancrying to the night. I had encountered it thiusands of times before. Still...i did not turn away, shield my ears from the grating noise like so many other times. Rather i sat, and listened to the growing volume of its tune.

_I came across a fallen tree_

_I felt the branches of it looking at me_

_Is this the place we used to love?_

_Is this the place that I've been dreaming of?_

_Oh simple thing where have you gone_

_I'm getting old and I need something to rely on_

_So tell me when you're gonna let me in_

_I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin_

I find myself growing thirsty, my mouth suddenly dry and irrated. I can no longer salivate as I soak in everything that is being said. It whispers to me, making me clench, I hate it. My veins burn in forbidden passion and my mind clouds over in hunger. That voice….the need to silence it…to control it….carnal desires swell up inside my hollow shell of a body. Glancing once more at the moon, my watchdog, I lift myself from my collapsed position and rise to meet the crisp autumn, night air. It fills my lungs, and as out of habit I saturate them with unneeded oxygen.

I walk over to edge of the building, my shadow falling me. My pale skin shines a deathly stark white, as I casually step forward over the railing and fall. The wind wipes at my cheeks and I fight the urge to close my eyes. I block the emotion that tries to fill me, as I continue my vertigo before I quickly end it. Stretching my hand, out I grasp the ledge of a window that is presented to me. My long fingers curl around it, as I graceful pull my form up to rest upon its tiny surface. By now my movements scream inhuman…. Unholy… impure. It fits the act that is soon to transpire, and I savor the irony of it all. By now my thirst for thick, pungent blood is condemning. It screams to me to be silenced and I more than long to obey it. Crouching down, I peer into the room that is attached to the window.

_And if you have a minute why don't we go_

_Talk about it somewhere only we know?_

_This could be the end of everything_

_So why don't we go_

_Somewhere only we know?_

Smiling a sadistic grin, I noiselessly open the window and filter in. In front of me a small lithe finger is portraying the part of a song bird. Letting the eyes consume every inch of smooth tannish skin I wait, as the hairs on my victim's neck rise. The singing has ceased now, the words dieing on its owners lips. Slowly the figure turns around, whimpers escaping into the night. The pink hair moves softly due to the owners movements. I feel myself ready to explode as I stare lecherously into never-ending amethyst irises. They widen in shock, a classic look of surprise filters the tan face and I find myself falling into brillant purple, as the young boy's lungs scream to meet the autumn night air.

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	4. Chapter 5

Chapter 4 Seduction of Pooless Eyes.

Disclaimer I do not own gravitation but this story and its ideas are mine.

Warning adult themes. AU vampire fic, Angst

Thank you everyone that reviewed. I love all the comments and it really helps me write. The more I get the more I can write. All I can really say is that I love the way this story is turning out and I hope you all enjoy it. So please read and review.

Also if you like this story PLEASE check out my other they are one gravitation story entitles Lies and two Naruto ones. Just Sex. An Itachi/Naruto oneshot and AN AU called Disquises Only Mask The Flesh. At The Bottom Of The Chapter I will include a preview of this story in hopes of attracting readers. Thank you

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You're taking me over. Over and over.

He wanted to scream, let his voice gain power. To let it reign out over the rooftops of the city that were submerged in the inky, blackness of the night. He wanted to move, to run... and to be consumed by the creature in front of him. He wanted to understand. To know.

He was trapped, paralyzed by the beast that took of the facade of a man. His muscles tensed and then froze, chaining him to the floor of his room. Hypnotized…terrified….disgraced….they all meshed together and all logical thought slipped throw his fingers like water. He stopped breathing, his heart beat transforming into a blooming siren that caused his head to swirl and his eyes to sway.

Slowly, perpetually slow, mind numbing slowly he cracked open his mouth and tried to process just what was transpiring before him.

He had been singing, self assured that in the fact that he was alone. That no one was watching, peeing through the cracks in the windows to glaze at his swaying hips and altoing voice. He had been sure that he was forgotten, undistrubed by the city, that his action were unwatched. With this reassurance in mind, this safety, he had taken upon the facade of a sound bird and sent a lullaby meant only for the moon.

Then he had stopped, his voice cut short as a sliver of something unexplainable raced through his nervous system. Calculating…questioning…it was the base of this sensation as his hair stood on end and he turned. Then the world suddenly stopped spinning, time halted, and the youth almost lost his mind. His self assurance was shattered even before he pivoted. Visions from the future, of destruction, of fear creeped along his back causing his voice to crack and simmer to a whimper. A warm tickle ran down his throat as he lifted his head and stared at the site in front of his window. Before him was a creature that pretended to be human. A beast that flung its shadow across his very form.

Fear was laced throughout his body, superimposed, and dominating. There was nothing else and the youth quickly realized that as he struggled to control his senses. Finally his fear won and it swallowed him like a consuming wave.

He screamed, letting his voice reign once again in the night's presence as he stared into pool less eyes. The color, the briliance, and depth blinded him. It confused him to the point that he lost even more of his mind. It kick-started the rampagae of Who, What, and Hows. He found himself drowning in them, in everything. It was as if they saw straight through him and into the deepest corners of his soul. It scared him and thrilled him beyond anything he could describe. He knew he should run, do something instead of stare at the being before him. Seconds ticked by, making eternity take place inside the small room. However it was the beauty of such a creature of deception that kept him captive. He was trapped, no way around it.

Beauty….perfection… its always the first thing that catches our attention, hold us with its death like grip, and betrays us. It was perfection, death, and darkness that this creature emitted and for one brief second the youth with hair the color of wild strawberries begged to be touched by it. However, fear seized him strongly and he screamed once again. This time twisting his body in attempts to reach his door….his escape…his salvation.

In a blink of an eye the creature of the night moved. With grace that would make even angels be consumed in envy, he rushed forward. With one hand he grasped the youth's neck and pinned him against the wall. His long talons ripped at the smooth, flawless skin that covered the muscles and bones hidden beneath. Pushing down the pressed the tips into the flesh. Between his fingers blood seeped to the surface, dripping over his long pale digits. Thrusting his other hand forward he grasped both of the boys hands, pinning them tight against his body.

The vampire's bloodlust was near breaking as he leaned his head forward, and smelled the scent radiating off his victim. It was powerful, it was condemning, and penetrated his dead body and clouded his brain. It was ss if he was reverting back to dawn of man. Craning his pale neck, he swooped down and extended his tongue. With one dilatory move he brushed the appengade across the youth's neck. Blood slid across its bumby, cold surface provoking a moan. The overly warm essence spilled onto his tongue and he greedliy lapped at the boy's broken blood vessels until fits of whimpering echoed thoughtout his victim's smalll frame.

The noises enter through the vampire's ears and made him even more excited, even more anxious to feel whole. Bringing his victim closer to his body he pinned him against the floor and began to lick every part of the warm, tan skin that he could reach.

That's when he heard it, the ticking...the insufferable sound that he had heard only once before. It was nauseating ... the monotone, thumping heartbeat of the man, the boy that was soon about to die.

It snared him, forcing a chain around his neck, and demanding that he listen to its song…its voice. It boomed in his ears. Screaming until he thought they were bleeding. It was powerful and commanding. It was as strong as his master, the cold bite of the dark, and it consumed him. It was a life thread, a symbol of everything he loathed. That sound was part of one of the many things that made you alive, made you human, made you naïve. He hated the sound; deplored it with each passing second. He felt like he was going to snap, to break in two!

He wanted to destroy it, to silence that infernal sound with every ounce of strength contained within his dead flesh. It haunted him, sent him withering inside to a place that he longed to forget. Grasping, he threw his head back as his eyes rolled into the back of his head. His body stilled.

He was there, once again at the moment before his eyes would shut forever, he was begging, he was feeling, he was weak. It a sense of dread into his stomach as the man that he once loved with a deadly passion loomed in front of his fallen form. Darkness spread out all around him, taunting him, make him whither in shame. Then it was over, he felt the life drain from his body and the cold pervad throughout his shell. He screamed, wanting it to go away……but it didn't…..he just…He didn't want to remember!…. he wanted to remember what he now was! What he became apart of!

Below him, his distraught victim moved. The purpled eyed young man shook and squirmed as he tried desperately to get away from the creature that held him down . Suddenly the vampire was thrown from his nightmare and left starring down at the young man. Before him lay the most violent shade of violet eyes that he had ever witnessed. Just like with the ticking of the heartbeat, he was snared. It grasped him, making him beg to be released. He felt himself go limp. He was drifting, more lifeless than ever before. He was lost in a sea of amethyst swirls.

His breathing became rapid as he felt himself being consumed. He couldn't take it and the words began to play inside is head. The words that his songbird had thrown to wind drifted back to slash him with their ghostlike hands. They floated on the wind until they reached him and then they forced his mind open. He screamed, gripping his head as he was exposed to the world. This sensation made him relive his life every little breakdown that had come with it. And then in a blink of an eye he ran from the sea of violent violet. He pulled himself off of what could have been, should have been... his feast of blood and fled.

He ran, leaving the window open to the night, and sprinted across rooftop to rooftop until he found a hole to curl himself up in and hide. There he shivered and tried to shed the thoughts and torments that had latched onto him and refused to leave. The twilight answered his cries and wrapped its frost like arms around him, silencing his mind everything else that was wrong with him. Wrapped in the false comforting embrace of his master, he drifted off to sleep where just another version of hellish pain awaited him. His dreams, his own movie of memories.

Back at the small three room apartment, the strawberry haired man shivered, pressed a hand to his bleeding neck as stared out into the night. High in the sky the moon reigned supreme, flanked by its servants.

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Disquises Only Mask The Flesh

Chapter 1.

Moans that were one-sided, heated screams that consumed everything.

Such pitiful examples of the sounds that echoed throughout the darkened room. Pain laced with numbness coated him as he listened to the sounds, his ear thumping with the heat of his beating heart. It covered his naked skin, skin that was redden from abrasive contact.

He bit down on his lips. His teeth sinking into his soft skin like a child biting a plump, ripened peach. Copper, metallic, the bitter sting of vermilion flowed freely down his throat. The taste that was slightly bitter soaked into his body and threatened to make him sputter. Gagging silently, he wished to become invisible, to become a nameless stone. Clenching his fists, he prayed for time to defy its normal path and quicken.

As such even the nameless stone had more dignity than him.Oh how that simple thought made him burn with self righteous fury. Anger was second best to him, perfect in the situation that he was presented but useless as a weapon.

In front of him, clinging to his skin like a slimly leech, a man slithered around his form. Biting, sucking, and tearing into his flesh, the beast that dared to call himself a count pleasured himself.

How becoming, how condemning, how affordable.

Shamed, disgusted, and repulsed; these words held no meaning to him, as by now time had taken its toll upon his mind and forced him to accept his fate. His damned destiny. Such a perfect marred image, he would laugh at its overused irony if only he was...permitted to.


	5. Chapter 6

Chapter 5 The things that capture your heart, twisting in the dark until you bleed

Disclaimer, this is my story and I own it. However I do not own gravitation.

Warnings adult themes, AU, Angst, vampire Fic

Thank you everyone that reviewed.

please read and review

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I breathe in, I breathe out

And watch the world float from above

I scream, I shout

And am swallowed up in the night

I breathe in, I breathe out

And bask in heaven's hell

The world shakes and Hell laughs

I am paralyzed

My flesh crawls, my skin melts

And I awake in flames

My heart burns and my soul is cast aside

I lay unable to live, unable to die

I breathe in, I breathe out

And pray to nothing else

Than a song dream long forgotten

Lost in hellish realm

I cut my wrist, watch them bleed

It flows to the ground, staining all

Taints the earth and becomes like me

I am unwhole, I am dead, and I breathe no more.

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He screamed, throwing his head into the wind. Inside his withered mind visions played before. He sat curled tight in a ball shouting, weeping, and screaming. Images, flashes of a past life, they called to him. Seducing him with their siren like calls. Licking him with their seductive painful touches they continued to fill every inch of his frozen body. They marked him, blurring his sight with their bodies, as he tried desperately to out run their ever haunting presence. They screamed their names, splitting the air, and forcing their essences inside his mind. They were talking him over, slowly, and completely. They were corrupting his entire being, throwing him to the ground to be shown exposed to the night. Inside he cried, begged for it to stop, to disappear. How release seemed so far away. A sense of nakedness and vulnerability filled him, making him scream even more. His strong, hatred filled will weaked as he watched himself from a distance. Like a shadow following a blind object he stared at his fallen image.

He was a human, blinded by the sun, and ignorant of the world. He waltzed through life begging to be accepted, to find a purpose. He watched as he was swallowed by foolish ideas and views of everything around him. He watched as he was seduced by the very thing that he feared yet loved. With feeble wishes he cried as his life flashed before his eyes. In one instant everything that he had ever known was silenced. His world crumbled as his heart seized to start; powder in the wing.

The life that he had once lived, the link to his very emotions and soul was severed. It floated away, always beyond his reach as he tried to grasp it with frozen hands. It slipped throw his pale fingers and was overshadowed by the darkness. It didn't matter how many times he questioned what he was the truth could not be altered. His reflection would not return. He was trapped in time.

What he was, what the afterlife truly was never changed to him. It never lied to him. It was a curse… it was an alternative… it drove him to the brink of insanity. There he floated in a dementia filled existence with nothing more than confusing lies and thoughts.

Inside the body of a man that use to be alive, the creature of the night whimpered. Finally his dreams resided and he was left with the shaky, crushed remains. Cold and frigid he hugged himself, cursing quietly as everything cleared and came into perspective. His words floated into the night and were silenced by the wind, a warning from the night for him know his place. If this was a punishment, he didn't know. Biting down on his tongue, his sharp canines pierced the dead flesh, and blood was released.

Stale and revolting, these words attached themselves to his life essence and gave it a new meaning.

Tainted, diseased.

However it brought a little comfort to his frazzled mind. It cleared his shaking brain and flooded it with a warmth. With this clarity the vampire's once sharp, criticizing persona came back to fall into place. Observing his surrounding from weary eyes he discovered where he was and nearly cried out again.

The breeze blew, sending the remains of cherry blossoms floating to meet his figure. Even in the possessing realm of the night the park looked beautiful. Of coarse it always would to him, perfect, and stained with blood. This was where he sold his soul to the devil; this is where he first met Kitazawa Yuki. Suddenly even more disgusted with himself he emerged from his hiding spot and fled. Anger floured him, caused him to curse himself. He allowed self loathing and rage to fill him.

Why was he so weak? This question burned him.

The fact that he had collapsed simply from a heartbeat infuriated him. No words could describe is rage as he jumped from rooftop to rooftop. He needed to right, to correct his istake.

Seconds later he stop and pushed his body forward to land in an alley. That was where he waited until he heard the echo of foots.

Soft, awakening, tantalizing. He smirked, his lips shaking. His hands clenching with a nevous need.

Hiding in the shadows he watched, his eyes clouded over with a predatory gleam. Inside him he felt it, the hated desire building up in him. Oh how he needed this. Needed what this tranger was to give to him. It was ready to explode, his need, his desire! He could feel it building until suddenly it exploded!

He lunged from the shadows and grabbed the form that appeared him front of him. Twisting it around with enough force to break concrete he growled, screaming into the night as he attacked. He was screaming, mouth biting like a rabid dog, he was screaming. It scared him, the noise he made but oh how was he screaming! Never had he done such a powerful thing, such an insane foreign thing. Blood slipped over his teeth, spilling down his nads and over his victums body. It flowed into his mouth when he swallowed it with unbridled passion. He was sloppy licking at his numerou wounds, slurping up the unclotted redness. It was intoxicating, it was consuming, and it was everything that he desired! He didn't stop, he didn't let up as he sucked his victim's neck, fingers, throat, and lips until every last dropped was absorbed. Still screaming, still crying with rage he left the body slip to the ground. It hit with a wet smack causing him to laugh. It head connected with the pavement splitting and spewing its contents in a messy heap.

Breathing heavily,his chest weezing with uneeded air he Leaped into the air once again. He outstretched his arms and basked in the moonlight's gleam. He was now longer screaming now his voice was gone and his bloodthirst saited. Closing his eye he brought his fingers up to ruffle through his hair. He coated his face in the lingering drops of human blood that his tongue had not reached. He was calming, he was returning.

Hours later when the rest of his returned one thought surfaced. He had been humilated, he had been defeated, and the human that did that to him would have to suffer his wrath.

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Please Review


	6. Chapter 7

Chapter 7 Damnation Is Only Charitable When Hell Begs For Mercy From Above

Disclaimer. This is my story; I own it but not Shuichi and Yuki.

Warnings adult themes, angst. Vampire fic, AU

Hello everyone. Thanks for the reviews they help fan the fire of creativity and inspiration so the more I get the faster I publish a new chapter! Thouigh onwe review questioned whn the h/c, yaoi, toys, and other stuff when the sex comes into play. My response is that this is anactual story and like all great stories the plot takes time. I don't want this to b just about sex nor do i want Yuki to just seduce shuichi like smut filled one shot.

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Tear my heart into pieces

I have one final wish

Damnation, asphyxiation

It's just a list that's near completion

Without purpose or right

I flee from your very sight

Gasping back on the pain

I throw myself into this hell

Burn me alive if I find

Another stone more precious than you tonight

Grasp the pain that storms inside

Laugh out loud as it all comes down

My wings have broken in the rain,

Crimson feathers, that won't wash away the pain

Without you, I know, there is no heaven or hell.

Only the cries that dance inside this shell

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Shuichi's POV

He was screaming. The fact obvious to anyone and everything. His voice was a siren, an explosive weapon that echoed into the night. Ringing into the wind it shattered into a sign of warning. Fabric swirled around his confined figure, his body coated with black. His mind was collasping, his brain struggling to comprehend the acts that were transpiring. Warm, frayed, black as a devil's soul, his kidnappers coat pushed harshly and uncaringly against him. He sputtered, his hands trying to push away the darkness. He threatened to choke from its suffocating essence. His soul was on fire, burning in a passion brought on by heart, wrenching fear. All around him, things flew past at a pace so maddening that his eyes could only perceive blurs and disfigured blobs. He was trapped, kidnapped by the very creature that had punctured his neck. The thing that had spilled his life fluid on the cold, barren floor.

The demon that donned the appearance of a man had returned, gliding into his room, and pinning him against itself. Cold amber eyes had flooded every one of his senses as he was overwhelmed by the entire situation. His wish had been granted, his desire fulfiled as he had once again stumbled upon something that appeared to have bloomed from the pages of a fairytale. The creature that defied all reality had seized him, held onto him with such force that he feared he would split in to. That was when it happened, time stopped, his breath slumbered into a thin stream of intakes, and he exhaled. His world had swayed and he had crashed. The beast screamed, jerked and his head back with a sickening crack. Lost in purple pupils, the creature transformed in Shuichi's eyes .

The image of a man was shredded, destroyed, and something that not even he could imagine rose to take its place.

Displaying symptoms similar to a nervous breakdown the creature seemed to have lost his mind. It was the exact same routine as last time, and it made Shuichi's heart beat with a frenzy. He didn't want to think, he didn't want to question, all he wanted to do was remain silent. To be blur on the world, a fly miniscule to everyone, it was the first time that he wished to become forgotten. He would have laughed, found irony in it all, but he couldn't. Rooted to the spot he watched as the thing he desired most didn't meet his expectations. Then it all changed, his wanting disappeared and he was stolen. Flying through the air and out his window, the wind whipped his face raw causing tears to flow past his dark lashes and into the cold air.

Unbealiveable, understandable, and life threatening.

He was screaming, he knew he was, and it made his heart threatened to burst from every joint and twist. He was flying; he was soaring through the sky high above existence. Perhaps if any other time and under completely different circumstances he might have possessed the strength to enjoy the sensation of being weightless. However, all he could do was cling to the beast that threatened to consume him with a nauseating pressure building in his stomach. His body shook as the high temperatures took effect upon his body. The moon hung dominant, threatening with its never waning presence. Its light shined upon his constantly moving figure and increased the fear that was lodged tight between his chest.

Desperately Shuichi tried to push against his captor; to fight in some small way. Squirming like a worm about to be snared by a fishing hook, he finally caught sight of the demon's face that held him so crushingly. Instantly his mind was filled with a rampage of thoughts. Dark and foreboding, images of rumors and whispers, scratching annoying in the back of his mind it forced him to recall tales of what would happen to someone if they were naughty; punished by creatures of a forsaken dark realm. Taken because they had committed sins, slain because they defied the rules of the world. All this flooded him, causing his mind to focus on childish warning to be wary of the things that go bump in the night.

"He was going to die, he was going to be slaughtered, and fed to the wolves," he screamed inside his mind. Hiro was now whispering faintly to him, telling Shuichi that he had brought this fate upon himself. Cooing angrily that he should had listened to his advice, that he should have had enough common sense to possess more fear. It was his passion for escaping reality that was about to doom him, to sentence him to a fate that was befitting of his mind escaping. "To be emotional is to be weak. To be passionate was to be vulnerable…" Hiro called as he took his leave and left Shuichi utterly alone with his captor. The truth hit Shuichi like a frozen tidal wave and he shrieked painfully into the wind.

The predator that held him smirked, amused beyond words at his prey's antics. Finally power was being restored. Finally he was back in control, finally he forget every damn emotion that he felt except desire and destroy this pathetic human. Looking down at the human he filled with rage and he too screamed into the night. His voice was hollow, lacking life, lacking purpose. It was exactly the type of yell that his sire had emitted. Shaking his head he cleared the memory, chased it away with the thought of what he was going to do when he arrived at destination. It would be beyond perfection, beyond relief, beyond any nirvana of heavenly sanctuary. Though….despite the words he thought, a part of his self , rose to the surface.

"What then, what will you do afterwards, what will happen if you still feel the same way you are now? Poor baby, they will cry when they glance upon your fear, filled form shivering noisily in the dark. What will they say, when you can no longer deal with what you have transgressed to after your little plan for saved redemption fails. Cry, hate, become filled with despair and try to cling desperately to your undead life hahahah… its only human after all."

That's all that it took, five simple words to have the vampire screaming into the night with fury. The voice inside his head chuckled, knowing that he had succeeded in trying to bring the blond nosferatu closer to his breaking point. That was his job after all; the sole reason that the blood sucker had unconsciously created him. He was an out, a way for the vampire to vent all the disgusting, self loathing that build up inside of his hollow shell. He was created to swallow the remaining essences of the once alive being's conscience. It was pathetic; the weak purpose that he was created for. However, it was the only way that the man could continue existing.

Cruelty doesn't automatically attach its self to the dead. All that cruelty is composed of is the left over pickings of emotions after the soul has vanished and the mind remains. Without a heart the mind is a maddening thing. With an eternity to waste on thinking, cruelty only comes natural. The need to destroy, the need for rage, the need to survive. With unbridled fury, they're just creations made by jealousy and self loathing. Envy is the greatest sin, the one that continues to kill you long after your heart has stop beating. The blonde vampire knew this and created him solely as way to vent everything that he kept bottled up onto everything else. He was the other demon, te super ego, and the messiah. He was the human that laid slumbering inside the vampire.

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He stopped and out of forced habit inhaled the stagnant air around him. Stale, tasteless, the flavor equivalent to paper entered his lungs, weaving distastefully in the air it overpowered any smell that humans might have once occupied the area. Decaying, death, isolation, it rolled around on his tongue as he breathed. The scent was perfect, comforting in ways that only he could understand. Whimpering, weeping in a pathetic stupor his victim now hung limp, finally exhausted from struggling vainlessly to breach the blonde's hold on him. Smiling at what was to come, the amber glazed man proceeded with his movements. His pace was slow, deliberate, and time consuming as he walked through overgrown grass and past a crumbling, stone wall. Resting hauntingly and deteriorating with every second that past, stood his one and only sanctuary. Every inch, every particle, and every single fragment of it screamed forsaken. A portrait beyond description is what he would whisper to the night as the moon framed it with its silver silhouette.

Three stories tall it stood, crafted in a reflection of 18th century Victorian architecture. In its prime it had been a famous night time cabaret. Coated in wave after wave of sin and filth, the place stood tall and defiant as people from hundreds of miles had flocked to it. Drowning their worries in a bottle of warm alcohol, and forgetting about everything that plagued them, skin and flesh merged into one vibrant color. It was an escapement from reality.

That was then, now it was nothing more than a simple, hollow shell. A reflection of every pathetic, human being that wished to be destroyed or forgotten. Nothing living had entered the place in over twenty years. Resting upon a hill, its foundation had shifted and the stairs that led up to the door had collapsed. No lock resided on the door from when the cops either kicked it in or it had rusted away. Inside nearly every window was either broken or fogged over with filth and exposure from the elements. Water was somehow still running though its contents possessed a color remarkable to that of mud. Heat and electricity were none existed in the building and when it rained it poured. Every floor leaked and the basement became an aquarium. The wood was so warped that terminates no longer longed to gorge upon it. However despite all this it stood, a will thrumming through it so strong that nothing so far had managed to bring it to its knees. That was just one of the reasons the vampire enjoyed lurking in its confines.

Reaching the door he kicked in and hissed as its hinges shrieked and slid forward. Then without any hesitation, he finally released the pink, haired youth. He threw him, flung him to the floor, and slammed the door shut behind him. Another reason that the decaying residence made him smirk in pleasure, you could scream until your lungs exploded and no one would hear the blood hitting the floor.

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I'm dying, screaming, and bleeding

Begging silently inside as my soul cries for my life

I am forsaken, I am damned

I'm getting tired of writing about death

I'm tired of longing for the light

Getting tired of dying inside

Screaming painfully I walk away from everyone

Burning furiously I run away from everything

Salvation to far to reach

My will not strong enough to keep

I haunt my own dreams

I will my blood to flow

All because I cannot face the truth

To be forgotten I must say,

Is something that has double meanings

Emotions are my poison

My reason for insanity

My reason for treason

My reason for forgetting

If I scream, I questioned, who would hear me in the dark

If I bleed, I wondered, who would see the stain

If I become something other than what I am now…..who will see the change

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Chapter 7Part two. The Wheel That Started The Change

Shadows blanketed every filthy inch of the room, their soulless forms attaching themselves to everything as they danced with aura of the moon. Its silver fingers crept through the broken, shattered windows and lured them to become one with it. Nothing had changed, in this place, in this house, time always stood time. Memories were perfectly preserved, perfectly vanquished. The creature loved this, savored it, devoured the way his victim hit the floor. Every instant recorded in his shriveled brain. A memory that was captured like a fly in a spider's delicate web.

He had approached his sanctuary, entered its domain and had instigated the steps that would end everything. He had thrown him, his pink haired hostage, uncaringly, ungracefully to the floor. A hollow, barren noise erupted upon impact and merged with the blaring slamming of the door centered behind his figure. Lying frozen, petrified on the floor, his victim whimpered emitting a sound that spiked his senses and sent him realing. Realization began to set in, reducing his victim's pupils to fruitless black holes. Now there was no more amethyst hell to glaze into, there was no trap, there was just despair. And that was something he could handle, that was something that he slept in like a blanket. It was perfectly smothering, it was perfectly acceptable to the vampire's soulless mind.

Dust had risen, flying into the air, and coating everything with a stale, putrid film of fear. It enticed him, made his flesh crawl in a way that was completely opposite to that of the human on the floor. The human that whimpered, that screamed, that radiated intoxication. It was madness, it was bliss, it as sweet revenge. Darkness was his cover, his constant and always present shadow, as he hauntingly stalked the room. He was truly the predator, truly the hunter, truly the betrayer. He was everything as he waited for the one perfect moment to strike.

Fear had run out of ways to describe itself. Panic, desperation, mind screaming insanity these couldn't touch the sensations that the pink, haired youth felt. Numbness was a blessing, a prayer that he wished for. Silently Shuichi prayed, pleaded for this to be just a fabrication, that reality wasn't truly taking place. Alone in darkness of his mind he was suffocating, screaming into nothing as he was swallowed. Coldness invaded every inch of him, chaining him, making him yell until he thought his vocal cords might explode from the pressure placed upon him. Still it overtook him, controlled him, inflicted him. Fire as cold of melted ice consumed Shuichi as he laid pinned on the floor. Movement was not possible, compatible thought was not possible, fucking doing anything was not possible. Shuichi begged, pleaded did everything in his mind to force his limbs to awaken.

Still nothing happened; still he was not rewarded with movement. His eyes, bloodshot and strained in every aspect tried desperately to break through the omnipresent dark to find the beast that brought him here. The beast that was going to kill him, the damn fucking creature that had thrown him to the floor and disappeared into the shadows like a demon from hell. Downing the cape and shell of a human Shuichi had foolishly allowed him to overtake him. Shuichi knew it was his fault, Hiro did not need to voice this too him, it was constant in his mind. Slowly he tried to calm himself, screaming inside for Hiro to return to his side, to help him. Seconds turned into hours and hours into a life-time as breathing became a task that he was sure he would fail.

Some how Shuichi managed to collect enough thoughts to identify his prison that he was enclosed in. It was a room, he whispered, a room with four walls, windows and a door. Thoughts of escape and variations of hope entered his body and Shuichi held on to them. Grasped at them with bone, white fingers and denied them the right to slip away, to elude him. Noises, little scratches, they surrounded him, causing his panic to build so much that it burst. Fear transcended in waves upon waves causing Shuichi to jerk his limbs and scream as if being electrocuted. Images of what was to come bombarded him; escalading to a point that the result was the burrowing of his fingers deep in the silken, mass of his hair. In one explosive sound Shuichi shrieked, pink tresses slipping threw the cracks of his digits as he yanked his hair out. Little splatters of blood trickled down to the bridge of his nose, the sight of the vermilion pigment sent a jolt straight through Shuichi. Laughter, hidden in the shadows, echoing from every angle arose from his actions. Amusement was clearly heard, his actions clearly fascinating to the thing that was going to kill him.

Then like a shot heard around the world Shuichi shook. That was all it took. Funny, laughable, hilarious, it was exhilarating to describe the process that occurs after the human spirit is put to its test. A dam was released, its waters overflowing and drowning Shuichi's senses as he lost all vision and saw black. The most unlikely of reactions occurred then. Fear vanished, pain arose, and angered flew to the surface as he once again screamed. However this wasn't a noise caused or produced by fear but by infuriation. A war cry it was, its declaration rebounding off the floor walls of his prison as Shuichi pushed himself to his feet and launched himself head first into the darkness. There was no need for reason, no need for direction, no need for anything yet a way to vent the swelling storm inside him.

Fury beyond that of a crossed God empowered every particle of his earthly flesh as his lungs contracted and breathing was no longer an action. Dashing madly across the floor Shuichi seized the vampire by the shoulders and tossed him like a rag to the ground. The same action that he had done to him, the same position that he had forced him to bear. A dog groveling for forgiveness, that was a label equally befitting for the situation. The moon light splashed over the undead's features before Shuichi blocked its glow, throwing his lithe body upon the vampire's larger one.

Surprise washed over the vampires feature as an act that he had never seen was put into action. Wildly Shuichi began to beat his fists; tossing his hands skillfully into the air he slashed the creature's face with his nails. Skin, traces of flesh, became wedged under them as Shuichi fought with everything that he possessed. Insanity had transcended upon him and this was its result.

Then in a second he was the one pinned to the floor, the one adorning the mask of shock as Shuichi stared into amber eyes. Beauty, the damn thing contained every inch of the words meaning. Flawless skin, pale as fine, white dust framed by golden strands of silk, and of coarse eyes as powerful as the sun. It was the face of a fallen angel, a creature that truly had no place in his world. Shuichi's inflictions, his strikes against that face stood out violently before disappearing. Skin sowed its self together, flesh infusing itself as the ugly blemishes vanished. Curiosity worked its way through Shuichi as the vampire pressed down upon him and bared its fangs. Noise registered in Shuichi's ear as a face was brought right beside his ear.

"Tell me, is there any thought in that head? Is your skull hollow, if I were to split it open what would I find. Will something spill out upon the floor or will it be as empty as a decaying corpse. " He hissed, his tongue clicking against his teeth as the vampire spoke for the first time. Pinned to the floor, withering in pain Shuichi focused on that voice and prayed. Desperately he tried to force his voice to be heard. Silence was painstaking, stabbing him with each second that passed.

"What no answer, no cry of desperation, no pleading? Can you not even cry, do you not care then? Should I take your life right here and now, end the inedible and put such a pathetic excuse for a creature to death? Do I scare you, is that it? Is that what compelled you to raise a fist against me. Amusing I must admit, no one has ever attacked me." He laughed, starred at Shuichi and smiled. It was a human after all, a thing ruled by emotions and swallowed in idiotic tendencies. A thing that walked in the sunlight and possessed a heart beat. It was breakable, it was destroyable, it was completely and total over come able. This was it, this was his moment to fix everything that had wronged him. This was his moment to prove that he was the undead.

Fix what though? The annoying question bloomed and attacked. Fix what, what would happen. What was there to fix? Below him the human was still unresponsive, still silent, still captivating. He reared back, his head spinning from the closeness and then lowered himself again. He breathed, inhaling the smell of the man beneath him and swallowed. Seduction was perfect, the smell as sweet as wine. Drowning in it he extended his fangs and sunk them into the body before him.

Warm, tantalizing flavor exploded in a melee of color in his mouth as he drank. It was perfect, he was floating, he was screaming in ecstasy. Colors filled his inner eye and blinded him. Bright and vibrant he felt himself being absorbed in them as he sucked at tan skin. Shuichi shocked by the action, whimpered at the pain and braced for the end to descend upon him. Above him the vampire shook as he drank deep, sucking his essence clear. Pain was slight, familiar, and uncomforting as he felt himself become dizzy and breathless.

Spinning in the nirvana that he had created the vampire pulled back, released his hold on Shuichi and fainted. Falling forward he slumped against the pink haired youth as blood leaked from the vampire's mouth and tricked down his chin.

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	7. Chapter 8

Chapter 8 Damnation Is Only Charitable When Hell Begs For Mercy From Above

Disclaimer. This is my story; I own it but not Shuichi and Yuki.

Warnings adult themes, angst. Vampire fic, AU

Hello everyone. Thanks for the reviews they help fan the fire of creativity and inspiration so the more I get the faster I publish a new chapter! I'm kinds sad that I got only three this time but the chapter wasn't one of my best. Again thank you for reviewing I hope you enjoy reading this fic. So R&R! Oh! And tell me what you think of my poetry.

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Tear my heart into pieces

I have one final wish

Damnation, asphyxiation

Just a list that's near completion

No purpose or right

I flee from your very sight

Gasping back on the pain

I throw myself into this hell

Burn me alive if I find

Another stone more precious than you tonight

Grasp the pain that storms inside

Laugh out loud as it all comes down

My wings have broken in the rain,

Crimson feathers, that won't wash away the pain

Without you, I know, there is no heaven or hell.

Only the cries that dance inside this shell

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He was screaming. The fact obvious to anyone and everything as his voice echoed into the night. Ringing into the wind as the fabric swirled around his confined figure and his brain struggled to comprehend the acts that were transpiring. Warm, frayed, black as a devils soul, his kidnappers coat pushed harshly and uncaringly against him as he threatened to choke from its suffocating essence. His soul was on fire, burning in a passion brought on by heart wrenching fear. All around him, things flew past at a pace so maddening that his eyes could only perceive blurs and disfigured colorless blobs. He was trapped, kidnapped by the very creature that had punctured his neck and spilled his life fluid on the cold, barren floor.

The demon that donned the appearance of a man had returned, gliding into his room and pinning him against itself. Cold amber eyes had flooded every one of his senses as he was overwhelmed by the entire situation. His wishes had been granted, he had once again stumbled upon something that appeared to have bloomed from the pages of a fairytale. The creature that defied all reality had grasped him, held on to him with such force that he feared he would split in to. That was when things seemed to stand still, time eluded him and the world swayed. The beast screamed and jerked his head back with a sickening crack, in Shuichi's eyes the creature transformed. The image of a man was shredded, destroyed, and something that not even he could imagine rose to take its place.

Displaying symptoms similar to a nervous breakdown the creature seemed to have lost his mind. It was the exact same routine as last time and it made Shuichi's heart beyond any more path as he clung desperately to his fear laced excitement. He didn't want to think, he didn't want to question, all he wanted to do was remain silent. To be blur on the world, a fly miniscule to everyone, it was the first time that he wished to become forgotten. He would have laughed, found irony in it all, but he couldn't. Rooted to the spot he watched as the thing he desired most didn't meet his expectations. Then it all changed, his wanting disappeared and he was stolen. Flying through the air and out his window, the wind whipped his face raw causing tears to flow past his dark lashes and into the cold air.

He was screaming, he knew he was, and it made his heart threatened to burst from every joint and twist. He was flying; he was soaring through the sky high above existence. Perhaps if any other time and under completely different circumstances he might have possessed the strength to enjoy the sensation of being weightless. However, all he could do was cling to the beast that threatened to consume him with a nauseating pressure building in his stomach. His body shook as the high temperatures took effect upon his body. The moon hung dominant, threatening with its never waning presence. Its light shined upon his constantly moving figure and increasing the every growing fear that was lodged tight between his chest. Desperately Shuichi tried to push against his captor; to fight in some small way. Squirming like a worm about to be snared by a fishing hook, he finally caught sight of the demon's face that held him so crushingly. Instantly his mind was filed with a rampage of thoughts. Dark and foreboding, images of rumors and whispers, scratching annoying in the back of his mind it forced him to recall tales of what would happen to someone if they were naughty; punished by creatures of a forsaken dark realm. Taken because they had committed sins, slain because they defied the rules of the world. All this flooded him, causing his mind to focus on childish warning to be wary of the things that go bump in the night.

"_He was going to die, he was going to be slaughtered, and fed to the wolves,_" he screamed inside his mind. Hiro was now whispering faintly to him, telling Shuichi that he had brought this fate upon himself. Cooing angrily that he should had listened to his advice, that he should have had enough common sense to possess more fear. It was his passion for escaping reality that was about to doom him, to sentence him to a fate that was befitting of his mind escaping. "To be emotional is to be weak. To be passionate was to be vulnerable…" Hiro called as he took his leave and left Shuichi utterly alone with his captor. The truth hit Shuichi like a frozen tidal wave and he shrieked painfully into the wind.

The predator that held him smirked, amused beyond words and his prey's antics. Finally power was being restored. Finally he was back in control, finally he forget every damn emotion that he felt except desire and destroy this pathetic human. Looking down at the human he filled with rage and he too screamed into the night. His voice was hollow though, lacking life, lacking purpose. It was exactly the type of yell that his sire had emitted with he sucked the life from his dead form. Shaking his head he cleared the memory, chased it away with the thought of what he was going to do when he arrived at destination. It would be beyond perfection, beyond relief, beyond any nirvana of heavenly sanctuary. Though….despite the words he thought, a part of his self that he had buried inside the cavern of where his heart should reside, rose to the surface.

"_What then, what will you do afterwards, what will happen if you still feel the same way you are now? " Poor baby," they cry when they glance upon your fear, filled form shivering noisily in the dark. What will they say, when you can no longer deal with what you have transgressed to after your little plan for saved redemption from feeling fails. Cry, hate, become filled with despair and try to cling desperately to your undead life hahahah… its only human after all."_

That's all that it took, five simple words to have the vampire screaming into the night with fury. The voice inside his head chuckled, knowing that he had succeeded in trying to bring the blonde nosferatu closer to his breaking point. That was his job after all; the sole reason that the blood sucker had unconsciously created him. He was an out, a way for the vampire to vent all the disgusting, self loathing that build up inside of his hollow shell. He was created to swallow the remaining essences of the once alive being's conscience. It was pathetic; the weak purpose that he was created for. However, it was the only way that the man could continue existing. Cruelty doesn't automatically attach its self to the dead. All that cruelty is composed of is the left over pickings of emotions after the soul has vanished and the mind remains. Without a heart the mind is a maddening thing. With an eternity to waste on thinking, cruelty only comes natural. The need to destroy, the need for rage, and unbridled fury, they're just creations made by jealousy and self loathing. Envy is the greatest sin, the one that continues to kill you long after your heart has stop beating. The blonde vampire knew this and created him solely as way to vent everything that he kept bottled up onto everything else. Though the way the nosferatu acted after seeing a simple human, made him shake in amusement and curiosity. _This was going to be fun!_

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He stopped and out of forced habit inhaled the stagnant air around him. Stale, tasteless, the flavor equivalent to paper entered his lungs, weaving distastefully in the air it overpowered any smell that humans might have once occupied the area. Decaying, death, isolation, it rolled around on his tongue like melted butter as he breathed. The scent was perfect, comforting in ways that only he could understand. Whimpering, weeping in a pathetic stupor his victim now hung limp, finally exhausted from struggling vainlessly to breach the blonde's hold on him. Smiling at what was to come, the amber glazed man proceeded with his movements. His pace was slow, deliberate, and time consuming as he walked through overgrown grass and past a crumbling, ancient stone wall. Resting hauntingly and deteriorating with every second that past, stood his one and only sanctuary. Every inch, every particular, every single fragment of it screamed forsaken. A portrait beyond description is what he would whisper to the night as the moon framed it with its silver silhouette.

Three stories tall it stood, crafted in a reflection of 1800 century Victorian architecture. In its prime it had been a famous night time cabaret. Coated in wave after wave of sin and filth, the place stood tall and defiant as people from hundreds of miles flocked to it. Drowning their worries in a bottle of warm alcohol and forgetting about everything that plagued them. Skin and flesh merged into one vibrant color. It was an escapement from reality. That was then, now it was nothing more than a simple, hollow shell. A reflection of every pathetic, human being that wished to be destroyed or forgotten. Nothing living had entered the place in over twenty years. Resting upon a hill, its foundation had shifted and the stairs that led up to the door had collapsed. No lock resided on the door from when the cops either kicked it in or it had rusted away. Inside nearly every window was either broken or fogged over with filth and exposure from the elements. Water was somehow still running though its contents possessed a color remarkable to that of mud. Heat and electricity, none existed in the building and when it rained it poured. Every floor leaked and the basement became compatible to aquarium. The wood was so warped that terminates no longer longed to gore upon it. However despite all this it stood, a will thrumming through it so strong that nothing so far had managed to bring it to its knees. That was just one of the reason the vampire enjoyed lurking in the dark in its confines.

Reaching the door he kicked in and hissed as its hinges shrieked as if in pain and slid forward. Then without any hesitation, he finally released the pink, haired youth. He threw him, flung him to the floor, and slammed the door shut behind him. Another reason that the decaying residence made him smirk in pleasure, you could scream till your lungs exploded and no one would hear the blood hitting the floor.

T8ouy6t jo89bn89hubyj bn

I'm dying, screaming, and bleeding

Begging silently inside as my soul cries for my life

I am forsaken, I am damned

I'm getting tired of writing about death

I'm tired of longing for the light

I'm getting tired of dying inside

Screaming painfully I walk away from everyone

Burning furiously I run away from everything

Salvation to far to reach

My will not strong enough to keep

I haunt my own dreams

I will my blood to flow

All because I cannot face the truth

To be forgotten I must say,

Is something that has double meanings

Emotions are my poison

My reason for insanity

My reason for treason

My reason for forgetting

If I scream, I questioned, who would hear me in the dark

If I bleed, I wondered, who would see the stain

If I become something other than what I am now…..who will see the change

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Chapter 8. Part two. The Wheel That Started The Change

Shadows blanketed every filthy inch of the room, their soulless forms attaching themselves to everything as they danced with aura of the moon. Its silver fingers crept through the broken, shattered windows and lured them to become one with it. Nothing had changed, in this place, in this house, time always stood time. Memories were perfectly preserved, perfectly vanquished. The creature loved this, savored it, devoured the way his victim hit the floor. Every instant recorded in his shriveled brain. A memory that was captured like a fly in a spider's delicate web. He had approached his sanctuary, entered its domain and had instigated the steps that would end everything. He had thrown him, his pink haired hostage, uncaringly, ungracefully to the floor. A hollow, barren noise erupted upon impact and merged with the blaring slamming of the door centered behind his figure. Lying frozen, petrified on the floor, his victim whimpered emitting a sound that spiked his senses and sent him. Realization began to set in, reducing his pupils to fruitless black holes. Now there was no more amethyst hell to glaze into, there was no trap, there was just despair. And that was something he could handle, that was something that he slept in like a blanket. It was perfectly smothering, it was perfectly acceptable to his soulless mind.

Dust had risen, flying into the air, and coating everything with a stale, putrid film of fear. It enticed him, made his flesh crawl in a way that was completely opposite to that of the human on the floor. The human that whimpered, that screamed, that radiated intoxication. It was madness, it was bliss, it as sweet revenge. Darkness was his cover, his constant and always present shadow, as he hauntingly stalked the room. He was truly the predator, truly the hunter, truly the betrayer. He was everything as he waited for the one perfect moment to strike.

Fear had run out of ways to describe itself. Panic, desperation, mind screaming insanity these couldn't touch the sensations that the pink, haired youth felt. Numbness was a blessing, a prayer that he wished for. Silently he prayed, pleaded for this to be just a fabrication, that reality wasn't truly taking place. Alone in darkness of his mind he was suffocating, screaming into nothing as he was swallowed. Coldness invaded every inch of him, chaining him, making him yell till he thought his vocal cords might explode from the pressure placed upon him. Still it overtook him, controlled him, inflicted him. Fire as cold of melted ice consumed him as he laid pinned on the floor. Movement was not possible, compatible thought was not possible, fucking doing anything was not possible. He begged, pleaded did everything in his mind to force his limbs to awaken.

Still nothing happened; still he was not rewarded with movement. His eyes, bloodshot and strained in every aspect tried desperately to break through the omnipresent dark to find the beast that brought him here. The beast that was going to kill him, the damn fucking creature that had thrown him to the floor and disappeared into the shadows like a demon from hell. Downing the cape and shell of a human he had foolishly allowed him to overtake him. He knew it was his fault, Hiro did not need to voice this too him, it was constant in his mind. Slowly he tried to calm himself, screaming inside for Hiro to return to his side, to help him. Seconds turned into hours and hours into a life-time as breathing became a task that he was sure he would fail.

Some how he managed to collect enough thoughts to identify his prison that he was enclosed in. _It was a room, _he whispered, _a room with four walls, windows and a door_. Thoughts of escape and variations of hope entered his body and he held on to them. Grasped at them with bone, white fingers and denied them the right to slip away, to elude him. Noises, little scratches, they surrounded him, causing his panic to build so much that it burst. Fear transcended in waves upon waves causing him to jerk his limbs and scream as if being electrocuted. Images of what was to come bombarded him; escalading to a point that the result was the burrowing of his fingers deep in the silken, mass of his hair. In one explosive sound he shrieked, pink tresses slipping threw the cracks of his digits as he yanked his hair out. Little splatters of blood trickled down to the bridge of his nose, the sight of the vermilion pigment sent a jolt straight through him. Laughter, hidden in the shadows, echoing from every angle arose from his actions. Amusement was clearly heard, his actions clearly fascinating to the thing that was going to kill him.

Then like a shot heard around the world he shook. That was all it took. Funny, laughable, hilarious, it was exhilarating to describe the process that occurs after the human spirit is put to its test. A dam was released, its waters overflowing and drowning Shuichi's senses as he lost all vision and saw black. The most unlikely of reactions occurred then. Fear vanished, pain arose, and angered flew to the surface as he once again screamed. However this wasn't a noise caused or produced by fear but by infuriation. A war cry it was, its declaration rebounding off the floor walls of his prison as he pushed himself to his feet and launched himself head first into the darkness. There was no need for reason, no need for direction, no need for anything yet a way to vent the swelling storm inside him. Fury beyond that of a crossed God empowered every particle of his earthly flesh as his lungs contracted and breathing was no longer an action. Dashing madly across the floor he seized the vampire by the shoulders and tossed him like a rag to the ground. The same action that he had done to him, the same position that he had forced him to bear. A dog groveling for forgiveness, that was a label equally befitting for the situation. The moon light splashed over the undead's features before Shuichi blocked its glow, throwing his lithe body upon the vampire's larger one. Surprise washed over the vampires feature as an act that he had never seen was put into action. Wildly Shuichi began to beat his fists; tossing his hands skillfully into the air he slashed the creature's face with his nails. Skin, traces of flesh became wedged under them as he fought with everything that he possessed. Insanity had transcended upon him and this was its result.

Then in a second he was the one pinned to the floor, the one adorning the mask of shock as he stared into amber eyes. Beauty, the damn thing contained every inch of the words meaning. Flawless skin, pale as fine, white dust framed by golden strands of silk, and of coarse eyes as powerful as the sun. It was the face of a fallen angel, a creature that truly had no place in his world. His inflictions, his strikes against that face stood out violently before disappearing. Skin sowed its self together, flesh infusing itself as the ugly blemishes vanished. Curiosity worked its way through him as the vampire pressed down upon him and bared its fangs. Noise registered in his ear as a face was brought right beside his ear.

"Tell me, is there any thought in that head. Is your skull hollow, if I were to split it open what would I find. Will something spill out upon the floor or will it be as empty as a decaying corpse. " He hissed, his tongue clicking against his teeth as the vampire spoke for the first time. Pinned to the floor, withering in pain Shuichi focused on that voice and prayed. Desperately he tried to force his voice to be heard. Silence was painstaking, stabbing him with each second that passed.

"What no answer, no cry of desperation, no pleading? Can you not even cry, do you not care then? Should I take your life right here and now, end the inedible and put such a pathetic excuse for a creature to death? Do I scare you, is that it? Is that what compelled you to raise a fist against me. Amusing I must admit, no one has ever attacked me." He laughed, starred at Shuichi and smiled. It was a human after all, a thing ruled by emotions and swallowed in idiotic tendencies. A thing that walked in the sunlight and possessed a heart beat. It was breakable, it was destroyable, it was completely and total over come able. This was it this was his moment to fix everything. _Fix what though? _The annoying question bloomed and attacked. _Fix what, what would happen. What was there to fix? _Below him the human was still unresponsive, still silent, still captivating. He reared back, his head spinning from the closeness and then lowered himself again. He breathed, inhaling the smell of the man beneath him and swallowed. Seduction was perfect, the smell as sweet as wine. Drowning in it he extended his fangs and sunk them into the body before. Warm, tantalizing flavor exploded in a melee of color in his mouth as he drank. It was perfect he was floating, he was screaming in ecstasy. Colors filled his inner eye and blinded him. Bright and vibrant he felt himself being absorbed in them as he sucked at tan skin. Shuichi shocked by the action, whimpered at the pain and braced for the end to descend upon him. Above him the vampire shook as he drank deep, sucking his essence clear. Pain was slight, familiar, and uncomforting as he felt himself become dizzy and breathless.

Spinning in the nirvana that he had created the vampire pulled back, released his hold on Shuichi and fainted. Falling forward he slumped against the pink haired youth as blood leaked from his blood and tricked down his chin.

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	8. Chapter 9

Chapter 9. Strange only Covers the Beginning.

Warnings, adult themes AU. Angst.

Disclaimer, I do not own gravitation but I do own this story.

Thanks all that reviewed! Your words help fuel my creativity some keep them coming! I hope you enjoy this story as I have enjoyed writing. Finally some action between Shuichi and Yuki! I'll be adding more dialogue for those that like and making my settings more descriptive. So please read and review!

65657676868799Renji9090909090

Take my hand hold it tight

Swear that you'll be

The only one tonight

That hears my screams

And listens to my shattered dreams

With whispering fears that sing

Far into the night with the breeze

Composed of a song dream

Crushed alive and left to be swallowed

By the twilight's latest kiss

To a demon burned alive

From the tears of an angel's swollen eyes

Now as I sit here

Filled to the brim with earthly fears

I scream at the thought that I cannot spill a single tear

89—8-979797Ichigo46575768790898

The sun had risen, driving back the moon and burning the away the darkness. It screamed, screeched into the dawn filled sky as it was once again extinguished by the sun's fiery rays. Its formless body reduced to burning, hot embers as the light caressed everything. Inside the broken house, bright fingers invaded its structure. Finding entrance through scarred windows, rotting wood, and cracks that covered the house like artwork. However, darkness still controlled the heart of the building. Overpowering the little tendrils of light that had managed to crawl inside and fruitless destroy it. A canopy of dull blackness still blanketed nearly everything as Shuichi sat paralyzed on the floor. Numb, cold, his limbs frozen and lacking feeling he was found. His pupils contracting slowly to the differences in light as he finally caught glimpses of his surroundings.

Filth was everywhere, trashed littering the floor, and the wood's surface was marred and broken. He had guessed as much, what else could expect from a place reeked of decay and stale bread. He had sat, thought, and breathed in this place for hours. In front him just beyond his, laid this attacker. Sprawled out eagle style with his clothes contorted messily and his flaxen hair obscuring his face. Dry, flaky blood was smeared across the corners of his lips, traveling down to his chin, and covering the upper part of his neck. He smelled of lilies, the odor slight and faded but still it clung to his form. Shuichi sat there, starring, and ignore Hiro as he violently yelled in ear.

He was insane, he knew it. This was his chance, his only opportunity to gain freedom to escape from this prison and fate. He knew it but still he stayed. After the creature, the vampire had bite him had laid there. The blonde haired nosferatu crushing his tiny form and his mind processed everything. Then after what seemed like hours he moved, pushing the creature of the undead off him. Then he did something that completely defied logic, he stayed. He stayed and stared at the thing that had attacked him twice and had kidnapped him from his very room. Any sane person, hell any person with a fraction of brain power would have run. Threw open that door and screamed into the night as they escaped from that hell hole. That was what Hiro had said anyway, but that was them and he liked defying all logic. He knew he was asking for it, sentencing himself to death but still he did not run. Instead he had pushed the man like demon into the position he now occupied and had observed very little aspect of him. With quivering fingers and shallow breath, he crouched over this thing's fallen form.

Nervously he poked at its skin, the act reminding him of a young child poking at something that was alien and foreign to their little minds. Their little fingers hesitating, as they feared that the thing they were observing would turn and snap them in two. Sliding two fingers arched strangely he slide them over the vampire's skin, Pale, cold to the touch, and flawless. The texture smooth and unbridled of any noticeable mistakes. Compared to its powdery whiteness his fingers stood out like a cemetery at a beach. Imperfect and awkwardly strange. It was freezing, cool to the very touch. '_Like ice_,' he thought and then brought his hand up to slip his fingers through the golden hair. It flew through the cracks between his fingers like a rainfall of silk. The color so bright and vibrant that gold would instantly become envious. Contrasting with the pigment of the vampire's skin it stood out defiantly. He breathed and let it the gold silk rest on his hand as he inhaled the scent of lilies. It was faint, sweet, and completely out of place. Still, it resided over the creature's body. Pondering as to why the creature would smell like such a thing, he moved his hands away from the blonde's hair and hovered them above the beast's face. At that moment the blood that stained the vampire's lips was wet. Moving his index finger he slid it over the soft flesh. It stained his fingers with a slick, waxen quality. It was strange seeing and feeling his own blood on his fingers, even stranger seeing it smeared across the vampire's lips like lipstick. Bringing his hand back he touched his neck, fingering the holes. It had stopped bleeding and already his blood began to clot and scab over. Pain throbbed dully and he nearly whimpered. Pain and anger still coursed through his system like a drug but was slowly being replaced by numb curiosity. Again he brought his hand out to touch the blonde haired demon and again he touched its lips. This time however he lifted the soft folds of flesh up and stuck index and ring fingers inside its mouth. Quickly he felt the fangs that the vampire possessed and quickly it registered in his mind what the creature was. Like wildfire he removed his fingers and scooted his body away from the vampire.

That was hours ago, now the sun was rising creeping its way into the sky like a snail as the incapacitated vampire began to twitch. Trapped, withdrawn, isolated those were the words that could describe the vampire's situation. Submerged in complete darkness he floated, his limbs reduced to a useless, jelly like substance. He drifted as if suspended in an atramentous ocean as memories began to flash through his amber eyes. No emotion filled him as rejected expression of complete nothingness laced with mind calming numbness paraded across his face. Their essence printing invisible vivid, crimson letters that screamed relinquishment upon his skin. His dreams, his damnation, his curse. The images of his past life, his embankment of crimes and foolish dreams, they screamed at him; pushing themselves against his body, tearing his clothes off, and trying desperately to break him. Like a movie trailer they played for him, their guest of honor, their favorite victim. The irony, the hatred, the mind screaming sensation created by this act fell on deaf ears as he watched himself live in a world that he could never touch; a blasphemous concept, a distasteful fact. Reaching his hand out, he flimsily grasped at obscurity, his reward being that of tiredness. Absolution would never come, the torture continuing until he graced reality and left his hellish mind behind. Finally the movie came to it's finally as his floating was abruptly cut short. As his feet found something tangible to touch, his body jerked and a crack appeared. Small, possessing a spider like image the fracture clawed its way throughout his mind. Fear, a sensation he thought he had left behind filled him at a rapid pace as a chunk of darkness broke. Collapsing to the ground it combusted into a fiery ball licking flames as light penetrated his darkness. Standing chained to the night he watched transfixed at the acts transpiring around him as his lacerated subconscious began to fall apart. In one instant voluminous fraction of his world were deduced to ash as light illuminating everything in his path. Then in one climatic second the light touched his skin, its fingers scraping across his skin causing blood to flow and fire to appear. Cruelly, purposely he felt himself begin to fade, as light, as heaven's flames danced against his form. Consuming every thought, absorbing every millimeter of skin, shriveling his body into charred flesh that floated into the air and then he felt himself die.

Jumping, breaking the thin membrane that separated reality from illusion, he was jolted awake. Pushing his palms against crude wood he breathed useless air in fighting the urge to scream. His eyes, instantly opened the second he came too, looked franticly around. His amber pupils darkening as he willed himself to calm. Repeatedly he told himself that this was routine, that this was nothing but ordinary. Cursing, damning himself with a heated passion, he violently seething inside for his outburst and ridiculous behavior. Bringing a hand to his face he wearily rubbed his eyes his body still. There was nothing to get worked up over, there was nothing to be afraid of, death had already come. Letting out short laughed numbness and visible weariness over took him as he lifted his upper body up. His palms supporting him as his waist and legs still lay sprawled against the floor. Then he heard him, saw him out of the corner of his eye as the nights events returned to him.

Clutching his legs with pale hands he resided, his being calm and relaxed. His small back pressed against the wall as he stared at the vampire with a disinterested glaze. His eyes, their purple lucid coloring waxy and bland as he glazed at him. Every breath was small, the action hardly visible. Dirty, his front covered in dried blood was the human that had been nothing but a thorn lodged in his side. Shocked, surprised, perplexed these expressions laced the blonde mans face. It was so out of place that his mouth threatened to hang loose. His prey, the human that he attacked, the very being that he had kidnapped had not run. The insanely pink haired youth that he foretold that he would kill had not tried to escape. This thought, the idea of such an action was almost too demented to comprehend as he wondered why the fuck the human hadn't run into the night screaming. His voice awakening every creature within miles, alarming them that monster had nearly eaten him. Angry villages, torches clutched in their hands as the banged on the door and set his sanctuary on fire would have been more expected than this. Suddenly without any notice he did something he hadn't done since his heart still beat. He laughed. His lips curved upwards and laughter rocked his frame as he brought a hand to cover his face. Amusement brought about by something other than cruelty, spite, or violence had occurred. Forcing himself to stop his expression of merriment he barked out a question to the silent youth.

"Tell me, to do possess any thought in that mind of yours or was I correct last night in assuming it was bottomless." Silence was his answer as he lowered his hand at glared at the human. "I could kill you, you know. Slit your throat and suck the blood that flows dry. I could in this very instant strangle that thin neck of yours till you could no longer scream. Did running away from me escape your mind or are you just suicidal? Do you beg for death, is that it. The very fact that you still reside here has managed to elude my reasoning.'' Still, no answer escaped from the pink haired man's lips. No movement was made, no answer attempted. The vampire's patience began to run dry, his amusement dispersed as anger and frustration began to swell.

Hey! Tell me! Why haven't you screamed, pleaded for you life, expressed one miserable fraction of emotion that you humans seem to excrete like filth? Why haven't you acted like all the rest? Do you think your special, it that it? Do you believe that I won't snap you in too? Do you even know what the hell I am? He snapped, his fuse running short as the figure that plagued him refused to acknowledge his presence. It was so typical, so human that he wanted rip that container encasing a soul apart and lick the stuff that spewed forth. Sick really, but then he droved on twisted desires. What else was there to do, how else was he to act. There was no guideline, no routine. There was no pathetic instructor handing out pamphlets on how to deal with a nonresponsive prey or the fact things have constantly managed to elude your grasp of thinking. Heh, if he was alive he would deem himself psychotic and spend hundreds of dollars on a shrink to confirm what he already suspected. However he was dead and the being in front him was causing an anger to rise inside him that he thought he had cast away with his soul. Thought made him wish he had burst into flames.

"You're the thing that goes bump in the night. You're a creature that defies logic. You're a monster encased in the flesh of man." Shuichi breathed. The words that flowed from his lips were strange, his voice hollow. Fear was the reason; he just couldn't get worked up enough deliver an emotion lace reply to the thing that acted exactly like a human. Frustrated, annoyed, silently seething and wishing to destroy that caused him to become provoked. Animalistic behavior, bland expressions, and predictable facial features.

A minute passed, the silence surrounding the two was compressing, thick, and lengthy as he analyzed the response he had just heard. The words, things that he had ushered himself, knew to be true struck him off guard. His mind stuttered at the answer, the simplicity of it. The letters that the human had spoken, their meaning was useless, familiar, and expected. When one becomes a servant of the night the truth to what you are is hard to miss. Still, no one had said them out loud, whispered to him what he was, said them in such a way. No one had dared talk to him, dared to utter anything than pleas and screams. The fact that he was actually having a conversation to an animate object left him flustered; the slightly painful truth winding him. Arching one delicate eyebrow he growled, slammed his hands against the floor, and out came his reproach.

"Hn, if you know that then why are you here. Do you not fear me, fear death? Or has this experience blinded you to everything? Have the marks on your neck disappeared or did you enjoy the sensation of me sucking your life away. Should I end it now, rip my hand into your chest and squeeze your human heart into it stops beating. Would you like that? Some how you manage to defy everything that I am accustomed to. You're an anomaly. A fly that buzzes around me head and threatens my own insanity. " He exploded, letting his feelings show. Images of him ripping the human apart entered his mind and he hissed pleasantly at the thought. He wanted to, needed to, but still he did not move. Instead he waited and calculated the man in front of him.

"You smelled of lilies. It was strange, Hiro thought so too. Hiro says I should run, that I should get as far away from you as possible but I don't. There is no reason just that you're…interesting. Hiro says I'm stupid but you look as if you appeared from a book." Shuichi smiled, his lips turning up little as he answered. He didn't know what was going to happen next, if this vampire was going to hurt him, slice him in two. The thought scared him, excited him in such a way that sent his head reeling. Inside his mind he danced, he laughed, and waited for the next game to be played. Grabbing on to him Hiro whispered to be careful, to ignore his desires, and run before darkness swallowed him. But he didn't this was breath taking and he wanted to experience every suffocating moment.

"At this moment I think you're too stupid to kill. If I sucked even another drop of your blood I'm likely to get something. Who the hell is this Hiro, do you have a vision problem! Are you're eyes not rolling around in that skull of yours, our can you not see that there is only me and you in this hell hole! Huh!"

"Hiro is real, he's here. He's like ripples on a water's surface, always occurring and never really leaving. He tells me things, tells me what the world is like, and that you want to kill me because in some small way I tear apart your world. I find that strange though, how can I do such a destructive thing to something like you. Hiro says that I'm signing my own will but I don't care. I have nothing else to do in this world so finding out what you are is entertaining." Shuichi laughed, uncurled his form and stood up.

At that statement the vampire thought he had lost it. Never had he heard such an explanation, never had he met someone that acted like this human. Perfect he thought I had to choose a crazy pink haired brat as supper. Smirking he let cruelty enter his voice. "Entertaining huh, how insulating. To think that a servant of the night has been reduced to a _human's _play thingCan you even begin to fathom the things I have done, the things that I have seen, the acts of hideous torture that you _things_ have perfected over the years that I have been observing your race. Hn, you are insane, a rejected piece of filth that not even scum would have contact with. Voices in your head huh, how amusing to _me. _The only reason you're not dead is because _you_ serve to strike me as a riddle. A problem that I must solve." That is it. And in that one instant he had decided, decided what he would with this human. Decided how to solve his problem.

"Are you dead? Is it painful, are there other like you. What are you, are you a demon, ghost. Why did you enter my room, haven't you ever heard of privacy? What if I was changing, hentai!" Wrapping his arms around his body as if to shield his chest he shook his head and nearly yelled the last bit. His pink hair moving with his movements. Inside his mind Hiro smacked him and yelled to be quiet.

It was bizarre, the human's outburst so completely strange that it rendered the vampire thoughtless. Then with out warning his face contorted, his teeth clearly visible as he sneered, growled, at the pink haired idiot that loomed in front of him. His eyes rose, narrowed, and an describable noise rose up in the back of his throat. Then he exploded, jumped to his feet, and screamed. Thrashing his arms around wildly he stomped around the room screaming hysterical and cursing at the world he found himself in.

"See Hiro told you he was interesting," Shuichi whispered as he pressed himself against the wall and watched the vampire throw a tantrum. "I didn't expect to break his mind." This statement only caused the vampire to scream more.

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_Why do I scream into the night_

_Why do I fight and cry with fists so tight_

_Why do I whisper in fright_

_At the thought of an endless night_

_Why do you stare at me_

_Glaze at me with haunted eyes_

_Why do you captivate me_

_Like a burning flame that never dies_

_Why do you smile_

_When I wish to end it all_

_Why do you laugh _

_At things so small_

_Humble has no bounds_

_Your wounds have no depth_

_Your smile has no mask_

_Your souls has no mistake_

_The meaning that you find_

_The purpose of the night_

_Makes your eyes shine so bright_

_As you wish to be the moon_

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ya! Dialogue. Tell me what you think people!


	9. Chapter 10

Chapter 10. Insanity isn't the only that rips apart the soul.

Warnings. AU, Angst, Yaoi, adult themes.

Disclaimer; I do not own gravitation but I do own this story

Thank you everyone that reviewed. I'm so glad you're enjoying this fic. Keep leaving me more and I'll keep producing them.

So please read and review!

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_Insanity comes on many levels, each one breath-taking in the highest degree of absolution. Each stroke, each blood curdling second, each piece of skin clawed off in a self inflicting blur is exhilarating. Throwing my head back, my neck painfully exposed, my muscles strained and torn from the angle makes me wish to be bathed in blood. Coat my skin with hot boiling liquid, throw me to the ground and let my skin become torn, exposed, and flawed. I will not cry for your amusement but for the gods in my head. I will not scream for self preservation but for forsakenment. I will not die with a peaceful mind but with a turbulent soul. _

These are the ancient words that I encrypted into to brain decades ago, when my heart still bled and my soul still shook with mortal wrath. I was young then, locked in a cage of child naivety, my eyes glowing with a light that I hoped desperately world not be extinguished. Fear, I still had the audacity to run from it. Pain, I still had contempt for it. The night, I still wished to forget its existence. The future, I still raced towards it, hoping to prove himself and trying desperately to shake the chains of loneliness that had attached to my skin and suck at my essence like a leech. I had forged, carved into my mind the ridiculous theory that if I tried hard enough, worked till my fingers bled, and ignored the thoughts that struck me and condemned me to be different that I would succeed. That I could bath in the light and feel relief, that my soul could be calm.

I was a fool, a child mislead by the words of society and the false concepts that they shoved down my throat until I thought I would suffocate. Perhaps I had. It wasn't until years later, millions of seconds, and hours wasted with fruitless results, that I found those words and wrapped them around my heart like a shield. The simplicity, the power that was excreted from each letter bewitched me. Lured me to repeat them over and over again till my tongue bled and my throat had became raw. I didn't know their meaning, the importance that they offered. No, to me they were just the remnants of a forgotten writer, a being that had been plagued by darkness, tortured by self demons, and left to die alone.

To someone that has nothing to look forward to, insanity is a perfect, succulent peach. Each slice of its plump flesh dripping with a syrupy, false illusion of bliss. God, how I loved to indulge in this act that rivaled carnal sin. To be swept away, to hang unattached as the world passes you by, it truly makes your flesh crawl. Everything is the perfect image, the perfect equation, and desire of the mind. If being dead has taught anything, it's that nothing goes as planned, nothing is routine, and nothing is what you expect. Truth be told I didn't know what expect when I died, when I was alive, when I was left with only my shadow to contemplate what the moon was and how the world continued to rotate and leave me in its shadow.

A lost puppy, the term disgusting and befitting.

Now I am completely bathed in insanity. I know this, find it maddening, and wished I possessed the strength to kill myself. To throw open the warped, termite eaten doors belonging to the hell I resided in and allow the sun to flick my flesh straight down to the bone. Hn, wouldn't that be something.

However I have surprised myself and therefore must remedy the situation. For the first time in a hundred years I am perplexed, I am angry, I am truly annoyed….i am ….i am composed and coated with the feelings of a human. My skin burns and sticks to my frozen bones like glue, it's coarse and disgusting. My mind shakes in anger and I left feeling swallowed. It's sickening, it's repulsing, and strikes an urge in me that brings me to my knees and makes my hand quake with the desire to rip my own eyes out. I do not wish to lay sight on the creature, the being of lower status that has inflicted these wounds upon me.

So here I am, my body sprawled across rotting wood. Its surface littered in filth and its core reeking of death and decay. My own sanctuary destroyed in an instant as a human presses his body against its walls. I feel the need to vomit.

A tune passes through his lips making his jugular bounce up and down as he smiles and his eyes glaze over. He's lost in his own little world, his hands moving up and down as if playing with a puppet. I'm the puppet. "I had to pick a crazy one didn't I" I mumble and shield my eyes from the sight. I think I'm suffering from illusions. My diseased conscious has created a hallucination in order to torture me. My master, my sire, the night has sent a demon to chain me and destroy what is left of my mind. Looks like many more years of self loathing are in store for this little slip up.

He starts to sing. His voice sweet, soft, angel like; it hypnotizes me and I find myself slipping. Anger rises as he continues to play with the stale air in this house. I finally snap though and give in to the urge to scream. My voice shatters him, awakens him from his spell and causes him to turn his lively eyes upon me. He smiles, making me squirm, and tilts his head to the side. I growl. Annoyed at the sudden foolishness and somehow find my voice filling the air. "Why in the world do you find that interesting? What got tired playing with your imaginary dolls or did they desert you because you're stupid?"

"Does it hurt?" His voice answers me. It was not the response I was expecting and it left me wondering what type of game the brat was trying to lure me into.

"Does what? The way I plan on killing or the mere sound of the shrill hell spawned buzzing that your voice makes?" He giggles, bringing a perfect hand up to grace his lips as he closes his eyes and seems to whisper to the house. My stomach turns at the sight. In my mind it's like a game of cat mouse.

"Noooooo! You! Does it hurt? Can you feel pin picks upon your skin? Does you flesh burn since you're dead? Hiro thinks it does so I have to know!" He seemed to explode with life. Each word that fell from his mouth replayed slowly in my mind as if I was witnessing an old fashion movie. There were no words to describe my reaction.

"Why don't you go back to playing with your imaginary doll before you really set me off you vile human! Why? Why? Why? That's all that it is with you creatures. Show them something worthy of being a freak and they gush as if they have no mental awareness. The only thing that makes you different, that keeps me from killing you is that you're insane!" These threats were useless. I knew it and saw the result before me; the pink haired youth barely flinched. No shiver of fear ran down his spine, no spark went off in his head; no scream was emitted at the site of my brutish appearance. It was fucking hilarious.

However seconds passes as he grew agitated. He pouted, crossed his arms, and seemed to stare me down. "Hiro is not a doll. He is apart of me. Why else would I play with him?"

"Maybe he's really fake and the world just can't stand you so decided to invent something get over not having the power to kill yourself" I felt better after this. Seeing the expression of slight rage that flirted across his face made my lips twist perfectly. I still didn't know why I was answering him, conversating with him, giving in to the foolish desire to humor him. I hadn't committed such an act in over thirty years. The action now seemed alien, unworldly, cold. My tongue felt thick, swollen, the feeling equal to that of when I had just feasted.

Then again what else could I do? The sun was reigning supreme in the sky and slaughtering while light coated everything with a burning film was as amusing as watching field mice look for food. All I could do was sit and play. Perhaps though, finding more about this thing would lead me to finding the path to finally killing him.

"Hn. Anyway what are you? Are you a deformed human?" He asked me puzzled before clapping his hands together. "I know, you got captured by the government and had tests done to you! Or maybe you're like the people that hang out under the bridges and pretend to be some ghastly creature!" If it was even possible I felt my jaw detach itself and hang lose at that comment. That was the most random presumption of what I was that I ever had the chance to ear. It made me want to explode like an atom bomb.

"Stop fucking around!" I screamed and felt my throat burn raw. I was tired of watching his stupid smile, seeing his gleeful eyes. I knew what he really thought of me and this act of playing the village idiot was getting as old as the decaying house I resided in. "What! Do you like that if you put on a little charade of being an idiot I'll show you some mercy? Do you really believe that crap that spews from your mouth? Do you want to know what I am! Haven't you gotten a clue from every action that I have committed? I brought you here for a reason and that was to rip your throat out and suck up the essence that flows forth." I was no longer on the floor. I had risen and seemed to fly across the room. My limbs became to take on a life of there own and I found myself latching on to his throat with my hand. He sputtered, a sneak like noise emitting from his throat, and something flashed beneath the surface of his eyes.

"I am the thing that goes bump in the night. I am the creature that would make the boogie man quake in fear. I am forsaken and you have now become damned. Your only purpose now is to become a meal. You are now labeled and sentenced to the life of a meat product. Fitting isn't it?" I brought my face o his and allowed my breath to whisper against is flesh. My eyes burned with lamented passion as I caressed his skin. This was the true game of cat and mouse. "Now, knowing this do you hear your heart threatened to explode? If it does I'll just get the chance to lick it up. Tell me, do you know what I am know? Do I finally invoke the essence of fear into that dense little mind of yours?

I smiled easily, knowing I had won and I had accomplished part of my goal. It was easier if my prey feared me for it brought with it a sense of diseased passion that was forbidden. Moving my thumb over his flushed cheeks and ripened lips I parted them and waited for his response. Counted down the seconds until I would be graced with his screams, for the pleas that would usher out of his perfect mouth and set my skin ablaze. However I wasn't rewarded.

"I….know what you are. You are the reaper….but you can't scare me." His words came in have broken sentences. Anger that was destructive and foolish over took me and I pressed down harder on his throat.

"Why the fuck is that!" I cursed, lowering myself down to the putrid level of using obscenities.

"Because in my mind everything is forsaken." It wasn't the answer I expected. Though, by now I didn't know what to expect. Reality had left me and I was trapped in the world of the sun.

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	10. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Thoughts of depression can kill. An antique Whore is only valuable to the collector called sin.

Warnings; adult themes, Au, Vampire, Future yaoi.

Disclaimer. This story is mine! But the characters are not.

Thank you the two reviewers that have been faithful! I love you! Thank you for all the good feedback! This will be a short chapter.

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_Lay me down upon my knees_

_And I watch as I beg and scream_

_To feel some warmth_

_From the sun _

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It wasn't what I expected, it wasn't what I wanted, it wasn't routine. My hand slipped, releasing my hold on his neck, and my face conversed to that of a blank slate. He slid to the floor and continued to stare at my, his eyes glowing in the darkness. It made me shudder. The amorous feeling of complexity and not knowing what the hell was happening flooded me. I was floored; I was….anything other than what I was made into.

Slipping down to the floor I felt my body collapsed and time seemed to sway. My mind quaked and voices transmitted their rage inside my ears. Yuki was screaming, my sire, my one sole reason for death was throwing himself against my mind's barriers and forcing images of the past to blind me. I shuddered and felt like screaming. My tongue became lose in my mouth and it began stroking my canines. It brought a sense of belonging, a sense of knowing. I couldn't forget that. I couldn't ignore the present; I could be trapped in the past. Because time stands still only for me and I have no place anywhere else other than the night.

I made a decision right then. I had decided, I had given in. I would humor the human and show him anything other than the light. I would show him what the real world was and what living forever in a nightmare tasted like. I would give him the secrets that I had wrapped myself in. I would show him the things that Yuki had shown me. I'd show him is own movie, his own memories smothered in foolish concepts. I would break him.

I smiled at these thought. Images running rampant in my mind. Felt my lips twist upwards and my fangs exposed. It was perfect. Closing my eyes I began to scream at Yuki. Telling him leave my mind and return to burning in hell. It was entertaining, realizing I was arguing with my own demons. Maybe I was the one insane, if I was, its just meant things would be looking up. I'd have a few more years of doing something other than watching humans. Then I felt it, I was forced out of my little display of dementia by a simple, cool touch.

My eyes opened slowly, my golden orbs becoming graced with the sight of smearing pink. Coldness drifted around my mouth as nimble fingers pressed themselves against my elongated teeth. He was touching me. The human. The creature whose head was showered in pink hues was exploring me. His body somehow gracefully stretched out. His knees where pressing bent against rotting wood as his hand was displayed like a willow's branch. His eyes sparkled and his lips were set flat, resting upon each other as he traced the outline of my skin. "You're insane" I whispered.

I had given up on being shocked by this creature, this thing. I didn't receive a reply, but it was okay. I had better things in mind instead of talking. Reaching my hands out, I grasped him. My bone colored fingers tightened around his waist and I brought him rest in my lap. Tipping his head back I licked the angle that his neck made. His sin was smooth, flawless, breath taking. No mars except for the lacerations created by early explorations. Studying him like he had done me, I felt my mind leave and hunger take over. My eyes feasted on the sight of him and I bit. My fangs extended like a snag unhinging its jaw to strike its prey. My lips brushed against their saliva, slick surface as they left the crevices of my mouth. Growling in pure lust I sunk them deep into his warm, pulsing throat and I growled at the taste that exploded inside me. Honey would be jealous.

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_Lay me down upon my knees_

_As flames lick my body clean_

_As I whisper to the night_

_And watch the moon drift from my sight_

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Vermillion puddles flowed into my mouth as I sucked gently, skillfully, artistically. I took my time, savoring each layer of flavor that seemed to be laced with into the human's life essence. It was like seasoning, as if someone had decided to marinate and cook this human. It was almost orgasmic. However as soon as I tasted it was over. Retracting my fangs I extended my tongue to soak up every drops of crimson that dribbled off my chin and teeth.

_This could be the end of everything_. My mind whispered to me as Yuki finally disappeared and my mind returned to wear down my body and indulgences of the flesh.

A whimpered entered the air, its voice becoming lost to the deafening silence of the room. Exhaling, I uselessly breathed into the warm body before. Heat radiated off creamish skin and inhaled every particle of it. Pulling my lips back I let my voice break the silence. A shiver ran down my prey's spine, his back twisting perfectly as I practically sung into his ears. His eyes glistened and I felt myself becoming aroused, contended at the site. Fear was present in the purple orbs and I enjoyed it, I enjoyed it very much. He was beautiful, awkwardly gracefully, and clearly flawed. He would do nicely.

"You will be pet. You're existence simply apparent because I will it to be. I will defy everything that you are. You will live only because I wish it so, and you will show me the truth about your corrupted world. You will lead down the path to true immortality, to be absent of all asphyxiating regret." I would keep him, I would use him, I would transform him into the human I once was, and when I was finish, I would toss him to the mercy of the night.

It was the perfect solution to the problem that he had created, to the virus that brought back images from the past. Besides what else could I do?

_Lay me down upon my knees_

_And show me the truth _

_About the sun that burns my flesh _

_And makes me lose all regret._

He stirred, moaned painfully, and twisted his body as he regained consciousness. I had laid him down upon the floor and waited with strained patience as he returned to the world of the cursed living. I would leave him soon, exit this place, and venture off to regain some peace of mind. Spending nearly an entire in the presence of this human had caused my nerves to become frayed and worn. I needed release. I needed the feeling of cool silver from the moon on my flesh. I needed the sweet escape of human death to purge my never ending thirst.

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	11. Chapter 12

Chapter 12. Understanding is paved in the blood of the naïve.

Warnings, vamp fic, Au, Slash, Blood, Violence.

Disclaimer! I own this story but not Gravitation.

Thank you reviewers. This is another quick chapter so I can hurry up and keep writing more. Please enjoy.

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_It is only after we lost everything that we are free to do anything._

The essence of this statement is so ridiculously close to being wrong, yet at the same time humiliatingly no farther than being true. It's only after we embraced the cold kiss of sin and life stripping fire that we realize there is nothing to gain. There's nothing to explore, there's nothing but the oblivious.

It's infuriating really, to discover this. After living your entire life enclosed in a box it is a great disappoint to realize there are just more boxes to suffocate you. Walls made of stone spring up from the grown like over grown weeds and threaten to crush with each breath that passes through your lips. This was what I found when I opened my newly sculpted eyes and marveled at the fact nothing really had changed. The transformation of me into something improbable.

By human law, the dead is not allowed to rise. By idiotic concepts, a corpse does not think or possess rational thought. By my sire's rule, I was forever to spend on the brink purgatory and question why thinks work the way they do. Hn, this was a task that I had already been doing long before I ever laid site on his ghostly features. An act that I will never cease to rid my self of. A punishment for my desire to leave everything behind, and achieve all the desires that lurked inside my already tainted mind.

Now, I am presented with the greatest opportunity. A chance to purge himself of everything and finally find the key to my cage. The solution to all the questions that are within me. It is strange; I find that a human is my Achilles heel… my source of personal redemption…my addiction for a quest. Now he stirs and I find myself wishing I had cast him into the night. For, every movement he makes causes me to yearn for something greater, for a more delicious taste of fiery blood. I find myself slipping and my mind's illusions taking over. Encased in velvety blackness we sway. Dancing to a dead man's tune, participating in the soul destroying dance of a serpent and he is drowning.

Now his voice calls to me, portraying the act and innocence of an angel while the ugly smear of mortality is laced throughout. I am hypnotized and it makes me question who is in control.

"Ouch, do you have to keep doing that. You say you can't kill me but why do you keep trying? I'd rather prefer to keep my blood as close to me as possible. I get upset if it runs to far away" He speaks, rubbing his swollen neck with a stained hand. It makes me drool inside, the site of his jugular bouncing up and down as nimble fingers slide over its thick surface.

I smirk, and allow my voice to volley back "Would you prefer me to suck you dry? No? Then get use to it." I frown at the look on his face and continue with my statement. I fold me arms, hiding my hands in my sleeves as let my eyes narrow into slits. Golden orbs barely visible. "It's best that you acquaint yourself with the sensation that it brings, because I have no intentions of stopping. Your suffering is my means of survival and it thrills me very much. It's the closest thing to what you humans call recreational activities and I have grown accustomed to its benefits. What is this scaring you? Or can you even process what I'm saying"

"Why do that? Blood is nasty. Why don't you read a book or play with dolls." He has yet to stop rubbing his neck and stares at me with an expression that is keen to annoyance. I raise an eyebrow at his response, expecting something more juvenile and insane to echo out of him.

"What? No Hiro says this; Hiro says that or some other retarded statement smothered in dribble. Is it possible that you're more intelligent in the afternoon or is it because you're realizing you have no fate other than the one I will provide you with?" I taunt him, allowing my glaze to leave him to stare out a crumbling window. The sun was setting. Purple was now bleeding into blue and soon black would cover everything.

"Don't think you're leaving, you're old life will be destroyed. I will see to that. You will live only because I say it. My slave, my disease, my pet. That is, if you prove useful."

"Why? Why me. What do I offer?" He stares at me more intently. Perplexity flows onto his face as his eyes venture out into the night with me.

"Hn, for once I have no answer for you. It seems you fascinate me for some twisted reason and my mind won't let you die until I have sucked every scrap of information from your bones." I hear a murmur rise from his throat but I pay no attention to the words that are created.

"_Like the shadow king that rises from the ashes of the moon to sweep away the pain of the lunar princess." _I think he smiles. I do not twist my head to look at him anymore. This wasn't what I wanted, I wanted to drive a stake of fear into his heart but it seems that he is immune to my powers. Why? Another mystery to solve.

"So" He rises from the floor but does not approach me. Wariness soaks throughout the room and I feel my teeth extend. "What are you really? Who are you? And why did you pick me?" These were all things that I had answered before. Though the response I had given him was only partly explainable.

"There is no reason for you to know such things. In this…relationship, I am the one that requires answers. You get the luxury of remaining ignorant. Word of advice, don't stand in my way. If I feel like ripping your arms off just to see how they twist I will do so. You're just a specimen."

"You're cold" he seems to whisper it as I watch as the moon slowly rises.

"That is what I am. A cold frozen corpse chained by everything." Poetic really I think.

He doesn't answer me anyone. I had silenced him, letting him fall into my arms as I knocked him into the realm of dreams. He was light, barely putting pressure on my limbs. He was flushed, his skin sprinkled in powdery dots of vermillion. He smells like how the sun should and I can feel the heat that radiates off of him. The perfect human, the perfect heart beat.

Wind rustles his stained strawberry tresses as I leap through the cloaked sky. I reach in his place in no time. Laying him down upon his bed I can not help but envision the effects he would have upon me. I leave him and roam the playground created by the moon. Waiting, waiting for everything to come alive and the sun to rise once again so I can creep through the screaming shadows and observe. Watching is what I do and I have an eternity to do it.

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	12. Chapter 13

Chapter 13. Sway With Me

Disclaimer: I own this story but not Gravitation

Warnings: AU, Vamp fic, Violence, Slash, Angst, all the good things that makes a story great.

Thank you for the reviews. This is the chapter that we finally get to go somewhere. Meaning the story will process and Yuki's and Shuichi's involvement a lot more. Shuichi will finally realize what and who Yuki is and Yuki will start to understand Shuichi.

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_I can hear the sound of violins  
Echoing in my mind  
I begin to sway  
And give into vertigo_

_While my eyes see only you  
I go weak  
I let the breathe fall from my lips  
Fill me_

_I can hear the sound of violins  
Long before it begins I give up my soul  
Who could have guessed such things were possible  
More graceful than rose petals we fall_

_I let you have a way with me  
Dancing in a serpent's glaze  
I go weak_

_Making everything seem an illusion  
As I glide like frozen ice  
Death is envious and curses me_

_As I sway with a creature from the moon  
My heart explodes  
I can hear the sound of violins  
Calling to my soul_

_As we share one last deep seeded kiss  
I wake from slumber and cry distraught_

_It's all just a dream_

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"It's all just a dream" I whisper, my words so soft, barely audible. My voice is strangled, raw, void of any real emotion as I lay sprawled out on a cheap bed. The sheets rubbed my skin creating an irritable itchy sensation' i dreamed about ripping them off my lumpy matress and tossing them out my window. But I couldn't move, my body ached, and my mind was lost in a drugged haze. A small smoldering fire blazed against my neck. Sink down deep inside my veins to make me moan in discomfort. My eyes, just freshly opened, rolled around in my head still I fixed my glaze upon the overly bright horizon. Soft wind traveled through my open window, caressing my skin like an invisible lover, as I watched the sun rise. Dark smears of color begin to fade as the sun burned away their bleakness, allowing red to be sprayed across its cloudless surface like blood.

I cringed at that thought, my mind contracting and screaming as I tried to evaluate myself. Inside I felt weak, confused, and pinned down with lamenting excitement. It was the first time in years I 'd felt so alive. It was as if the fairytales and lies that had been created in my mind had found souls, gained life, and blossomed into something real. A dark sinister creation had been given breath. Refusing to remain dormant it fed from my most secret of carnal desires. It was as if I had created another means of being unique, finally finding an escape from the world's disappointment, of not being average enough. I kept trying vainly to pound the fact that everything was just a delusion, that he was just something the fading light had created.

Still, the night's events had been too real, to terrifying, to soul consuming to forget. I could not just brush them under the carpet like dirt and forget that they exstisted. There were consequences that would arise, outcomes that I would have to face. I felt smothered somehow. Every horrible thought that I conjured was being shoved down my throat till until my eyes rolled into the back of skull and my skin became a sheet of ice. I wanted to scream, I wanted to carry on like a psychopath, to bleed my throat dry screaming that I hadn't left the confines of my room. However I was not graced with such a privilege.

Nothing added up. A freak show with mirrors laced with smoke seemed more rational than the trip I hade taken the night before.

"Still," I breathed as I pressed my body into my cheap cotton duvet. I prayed to be forgotten. I prayed to be left alone. I prayed for Hiro to make everything disappear. I groaned and showed my devotion to a God. I did this because I knew that despite my longing, despite my over the top desires that it was all real. Nothing other than Hiro was a figment of my imagination. Nothing that perfect could have been sprung from my mind. The man, the beast with fangs that dripped with spoiled spilled blood was real. The being that excreted darkness, produced the raw animal magnetism of sex, the creature that demanded obedience was something as tangible as the wound placed on my neck.

I shuddered, I squirmed, I exhaled uneasiness and clutched my sheets tighter. My knuckles turned to bluish white and my fingers stiffened. I moaned, strickened remembrance of steely bone piercing my flesh. Teeth so sharp that they slide inside me like I was melted butter. I was consumed and brought down to my knees as my blood was sucked greedily and sinfully from my neck. Three times, three times I had allowed the demon to rip my skin apart and violate me with his devil's tongue. Three times I had permitted him to do such a frightening act without repercussions.

It was pathetic, it was disgraceful, and if the blonde Adonis had decided to silence me nothing would have prevented him from tasting the hard muscles hidden in my body. Nothing would have stalled him from tearing me apart and opening me up like macabre story book. I cringed.

"You're just ashamed that if you died, if you were wiped off the face of this planet like common dirt, there would be nothing to tell that you lived. Nothing except the sticky dried stain of your blood on the floor." Hiro whispered the words to me and vainly I tried to block his voice. He was right, and it scared me to no end. I was a hypocrite, my behaviors a constant controversy. I claimed that I didn't want to be average, didn't want to be forgotten, but now I wanted nothing more to be invisible.

"So what, it doesn't mean that everything is final. That my fate can't be reversed," it was a weak retort but nothing else seemed to enter my mind. The sun fell across my face and my skin tingled with its warm rays. I sighed as I remembered the feeling of ice pressing against my skin, as a figure loomed over top of me ready to strike. It was like an arctic glacier freezing me straight down to the bone and I was force to call upon the sight of him once again.

His skin was the pigment of powered snow, softer than a rose's petals, and perfectly unflawed. His lips were a pale tinted shade of pink and when he sneered rows of bone white teeth were presented. I cursed myself, punishment myself mentally for my foolishness. However I could ignore the truth. I was memorized, I was snared. I was captivated by such a man.

Blushing so hard that I knew my cheeks were smeared with burgundy red. I began to scold myself profusely and pushed my head deep into my mattress as I recalled my behavior when he turned his eyes upon me.

I was a fool. Not only had I refused to seize the opportunity and run, to escape from his clawed clutches, and run screaming into the pitch black night for help. To find a way to rescue myself. Instead I had acted like a under minded child, a reality challenged piece of trash. The words, the sounds, and answers that had fallen from my lips were laced with fear and the complete understanding knowledge that I had no idea what was transpiring around me. The questions that I had bravely tried to ask him were idiotic. I had thought that I was taking the safest route and acted like a brain dead piece of meat. But…but in my defense he was more than just intimidating. With eyes so feral and mind controlling, I was drowning in amber.

And now…now I was so floored that I felt the perfectly, sculpted façade that I had grueling cemented into place crack. Sprinkles of dust rained down upon my head and I was corrupted with the fact that I now belonged to a demon. I had sold my soul, I was dead.

"Not really smart huh, I did tell you to run but you had to stay and play doctor. Did you really think that if you observed him you could figure out what he was?" Hiro's voice was full of anger as he scolded me. I felt even more like a child. I knew that I had brought this upon myself, but I couldn't shake the feeling that I was only a little scared at belonging to that beast. So what if I had offered myself to him like an appetizer? I had come to the conclusion that there was nothing that I could do. Like he said, I only existed because he willed it. I was sentenced to a life in imprisonment.

"You're more insane that corpse" Hiro mocked. "At least you talk more and possess better manners." He scoffed and caused me to hiss in embarrassment. Still, I took comfort in the fact that I had somehow caused that creature to become unsettled. I was not that naïve that I did recognize the behavior he demonstratived upon staring into my eyes. Perhaps, I thought, I can weaken him. I longed to find out how. I begged silently to find out why he had picked me and what he had in store for me. I quaked at the idea of what I would loose to achieve that wish.

"Play with fire and you will get burned. It's an annoyingly cliché saying but I think it applies perfectly to your situation. So unless you want him to sink his fangs into your soft flesh I suggest you stay far away from that thing."

"And just how do you suggest I do something like that! The only reason I'm even back stewing in this place is because he brought me back." I argued with him though knowing it would do no good. Hiro would not listen. "How am I supposed to hide from…from that! What, do you think I can just pack up leave? Where would I go? How would I get there?" How long would it take before that man found me and split me open like some gothic fairytale.

"The term is vampire. Or did you not watch all those blatantly, outdated movies when you were younger? How else do you explain the fangs and the fact that he enjoyed forcing himself upon you and sucking at your neck? What? Did you thank he was some gothic poser looking for a quick fix? I think not!"

A vampire, I shivered and gulped. I felt like I had allowed one of my fantasies to take control and lead me straight into hell. I felt like I was trapped inside a black in white horror movie. After all, everything so far seemed to mimic one and I was dreading when the climax would hit.

"Running from something that is as easy as making you leave me alone for day."

"Touché, it's very easy to see that the big, bad blood sucker has infected you. Though this time the blame falls upon your shoulders. I asked you to follow three simple rules and that's it. Now tell me what where they again? I told you to never talk to strangers, never go out after dark, and what was the last one huh? Huh? Never keep your window open! I guess I should have added never fraternize with the undead or the damned."

Hiroshi volleyed back to me and I felt the deep seeded urge to smack myself just to silence him.

"So tell me dear, sweet Hiroshi. How do I get out of this mess! How do I manage not ending up in the obituary section of the daily newspaper. How do I keep that _vampire_," I hissed the word like it was burning my tongue just by sounding the syllables to pronounce it, "from tearing me apart and sucking out every single drop of blood from even the tiniest crevices inside my body?"

"You're on your own here kid. Though, just remember that I enjoy life and its benefits very much. Also if _you_ die I die to! So in other words don't screw up!"

The last part came out in a shout so loud that my ear drums pulsed. Hiro sighed, then left me to myself. Once he had exited I felt a wave of relief wash over me at the thought that I could now voice a deep dark secret. Forget being owned by that thing. Forget knowing that I was doomed. Forget questioning what the blonde beast wanted from me. No, the only thing that I truly had to fear was that….that despite his animalistic and clearly demonic behavior I… was attracted to him. I was attracted to a corpse, to a vampire. I was screwed and I didn't need Hiro to figure it out.

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"Hn, how appropriate, it's a freaking cloudless day," I murmured. My voice hid nothing as I allowed anger to clearly shine through. I was infuriated, angered to the point of sulking in self pity. My blood was boiling, and I if I had not been cursed with pale skin pigments, I'm sure that my face would explode in a melee of red and tinted pink. I shook with self rage at what I had done. I felt like clawing my eyes, stripping my skin off in layers, and then stuffing them down my throat.

I cursed myself even more for putting myself into this predicament. I had the audacity to let the brat go and thus had sentenced myself to hiding like a wounded animal. The sun shone brightly, making me hiss and slink away to a darker hiding place. Fear would have been a perfect emotion to express my distaste for that burning ball of gas. It was disgusting, the amplitude of the situation made me want to grind my nails against concrete. I was furious and it just wasn't because I had to hide in the shadows like spineless bugs and vermin.

No, it was because of my decision, the choice to keep the brat alive. Sure I had proclaimed and spewed threats of death and disembowelment, sunk my teeth into him, and practically did the "I'm badder and bigger than you" act. However, other than telling him I would mold and shape him into my puppet I had no idea just how to achieve such results. I was a solitary creature, I did not keep vermin and other pieces of trash as pets, slaves, or even as fresh blood pumps. I was a torturer, a killer, a beast that exploited my animalistic instinct simply because I could. I knew this and I ignored what I wanted him to be, what he should have been, a free dinner.

However, I was left stricken with memories of my past, my unbearable mistakes, and my passions. I was overwhelmed by his pooless eyes and the depth that I saw in them. I was embarrassed to find that I longed for the solace and the fleeting sense of peace hidden beneath the waves of violet. I wanted it to end, I didn't want to feel anything other than I felt now. I wanted…I wanted to be locked in denial. I didn't want to be smothered by regret and know it.

I want, I want, I want. I could say it thousands of time, scream it from the roof tops, and still I would never get what I desired. I had thought that since time had stopped for me, that destiny had turned its one stone eye away from me. I thought that fate was blind and I was lost. I had believed that no omnipotent being other than death, had stopped creating cruel farces in which to watch me fall.

How naïve I was.

Still, I could dream. I could block everything from my mind, just like I did with my memories, and pretend that the pink brat wasn't real. Imagine that the amethyst, eyed mortal was just a figure composed of latent emotions. I could masquerade that the feelings I had painstakingly tried to suppress were breaking free and seeking their revenge against me.

Perhaps this was punishment for pretending that I was the alpha killer, completely unreachable by human feelings and pressing mortality. Perhaps I had finally craved, my façade crumbling like dust, as my mind succumbed to the delirious images created by the voices inside me. Perhaps.

I brought a cool hand up to wipe my eyes, to erase the thoughts that made my head pound and my body quiver. The air was scolding hot, infecting me its tendrils of fire and causing vulnerability to bloom. I was growing weary; losing my self to the flames of the sun as it lazily crawled to meet the blue backdrop of clouds

. "Filthy unchangeable ball..." I murmured, not bothering to finish my sentence as I pressed my back into a wall and shrunk into cool shadows. Once submerged I began to trembled. Lifting my hands, I began to dig through the pockets of coat until I found my means of release and grasped silver. Holding the small encasement of death i flipped its top open and released the flame.

It took only seconds and before long I was inhaling tobacco. The sweet taste of acid and smoke rolled around in my mouth, settling on my tongue and making me coo in appreciation. The smoke emitted from the slim, white stick sunk deep into my skin. Flowing perfectly down my throat as the nicotine went to work. I shouldn't be tasting anything, shouldn't be feeling the sensation of burning paper but I did.

I had found that the mind was a versatile thing; I found that even death could not stop me from recalling the comfort that a cigarette brought. I discovered that if I focused my mind solely on an object, that my taste buds would regenerate and I could summon up some means of comfort.

Fascinating.

I stared out into the burning light as I hid, my mind turning and scheming as my cigarette wasted to ash. I had decided what I was going to do, what I was going to get out correlating with a human. I remained there for hours, staring out upon the world. Watching as time turned and my body stood still. I watched as the run rose and fell. As colors merged into one perfect hue and the stars were sprayed across the black blanket of the night like diamonds. I stood there in the freezing night, my hands nested in my pockets and my eyes flickering in the light shed by stree lamps. My breath escaped from my mouth, seeping into the blackness. No warm puffs were created; no heat was allowed to bloom. I felt the hunger, the thirst rise up within me and felt my mind grow weary as I fixed my site upon one goal.

It was time to find the creature whose eyes shimmered like jewels in the sun's dying light.

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The air prickled as goose bumps exploded across my skin and I clutched my arms tightly. My knuckles turned white and my face mimicked the paling color. Cold, a wind icier than I had ever felt wrapped its self around my body as it barged into my room. My curtains rustled at the intrusion. The site of them flapping about sent a jolt through my system and my mind played tricks on me.

Horrible images splashed across my eyes while a whistle thrummed through my ears caused dread to form in my stomach like a lead anchor. I told myself to stop acting like a fool, to grow a backbone, and except reality. I screamed at myself to shut the window and run. I berated my mind to seek refuge and ignore the call of the demon.

I didn't move. My body went rigid and I collapse onto my bed. I didn't rush to the window, I didn't slam it shut, I didn't hide. Instead I stared out into the dark and braced myself. My neck burned, the devils mark tingling with a fire's scorching kiss. I braced my mind and pushed all fear into a ball and set it ablaze. Hidden down deep inside me, excitement and fantasy waited to be unleashed. Like a loud speaker it shrieked to be allowed to roam free among the living. It screamed to let it take me somewhere that only I knew, a place where things like vampires weren't allowed to puncture my skin and suck me dry. I shivered and betrayed these feelings, the urge to escape reality. I squashed all feelings and found myself without emotion. A void would be envious. Minutes ticked by, the wind echoing in my ears and trying desperately to scare me.

"What will you do when comes in search of you? What will you do if he decides to sink his teeth once again into your flesh?" Hiro asked me as inside my mind he cradled me close. He whispered sweet nothings into my ears and watched the window with steely eyes. Always my protector, always my inner self. He could do all the things I couldn't.

"The only thing I can do is let him sweep me away and pray that I survive long enough to see something extraordinary." I spoke the truth and watched as the wind had its way with my cheap frayed curtains. I no longer felt the cold, felt the fear. I knew that as long as Hiro held me close I would be safe, my constant crutch.

"Something extraordinary? Is that what you think is going to happen. Death is on your heels and that's the only thing you can decide upon doing?" He tried to reprimand me, to let fear seize me. He wanted me to know my limits.

"We all die Hiro, at least I can try to live as long as possible and find a way to answer the things that shock me. I want to understand him, I want to know what he really is, I want to mess with death."

"And what happens when death messes back! If you insist on acting like you're already in the ground with dirt flowing onto your head then I won't stand in your way. Let him claim you and then we will see if you find something extraordinary when your bones turn to ash and your soul is ripped apart!" Hiro hissed at me, released his hold on my body, and glared at me with anger running rampant through his eyes. I stared at him, not able to respond as he left me to face everything by myself. Tilting my head back I cried silently for Hiro to return.

Then, I felt it, the cold caress of the night as fingers brushed over my mouth and fingered my lips. Breathing heavily I opened my eyes and was seized by shock. Amber eyes held me captive as the vampire clammed his hand over my mouth, muffling my screams. His skin was stone cold, steely, and powerful as I tried to pull away. Growling in anger he jerked me forward, bringing his face close to mine. No breath fell upon my skin and I felt myself melting under his glaze. I loved it all, I longed to touch his snow white skin and see how it bent under my fingertips.

However my mouth was throbbing, my neck stinging with pain, and I watched helplessly as he spoke.

"I believe this method keeps any foolish words from escaping your mouth. Did you enjoy your day away from me? I think I gave you enough time to prepare for my arrival?" His words flowed over me like melted butter and I leaned into his touch as his tongue ghosted over my neck. He licked my skin, savoring the taste of me before finally releasing his hold on my mouth. Grasping from the lack of contact I fell back onto the surface of my bed. Twisting my head up, I stared at his hovering form as I placed my hand over my neck.

"Please, I don't feel like sucking anything out of you tonight… I'm in the mood for something more succulent." He turned away from me, allowing his cynical eyes to survey my room. "Not the biggest spender, figures, I had to choose a human that surrounds himself in poverty."

"It's cozy!" I snapped and felt myself blush as the vampire turned to stare at me. Quirking an eyebrow he smirked and returned to examining my things.

"If you feel the need to shout at least you should use more than two words." Walking over to my bed he brought his visage inches away from mine.

"What cat got your tongue?" he seemed to purr the words. His pink tongue licking his pale lips and I felt like fainting

"You're…you're enjoying this." I stammered, sighing with relief as he pulled away from me. "Do vampires always joke around or are you an exception?"

"Do all humans immediately swoon at the whole dark and dangerous routine are you simply a freak?" He mocked and I felt heated anger rise within me.

"Do all vampires keep attacking people's neck like they're God!"

"What did you say?" He approached me, grabbing my neck with such strength I felt like I would snap in two.

"God is not here and if you think that by angering me one of your twisted dream worlds will come alive and take you off to never land, then you are sadly mistaken. I came here to see if you truly were a shallow brain dead fool. I came to claim my property." I was suffocating, my lungs begged for air as his grip got tighter with each passing second.

"I'm not your property" I squeaked trying to pull his hands off me. "I don't belong to anyone!" I screamed as his grip tightened and with one desperate effort I raised my hand and slapped him. My nails sunk into his porcelain skin tearing off thin strips of white silk. Instantly he released me, his hands going to his face as blood trickled down.

"Looks like the bitch has a back bone after all" I thought he was going to kill me, to strike me back, to sink his fangs into my neck once again. Instead he stared, his face healing within seconds before he began to laugh. A deep rolling echo escaped from his lips and sent shivers through my body. It was electric, it was tingling, and it scared me to no end.

"What is your name?" he breathed, his eyes examining every part of me.

"Shindou….Shuichi." I stammered, stepping back. I was trying to put as much distance between us as possible. I wanted to ask him his, to know what he was called. I wanted to know him.

"Do you realize that by giving me your name you have just giving me more of a hold over you? No? Well, just for this," He touched his face, his body going calm.

"Just for that I will answer one of your pitiful questions. I will show you what I really am." With that said he grabbed me and fled from my room. Blasts of freezing wind hit me at full force as we fell, pushing on my lungs and preventing me from screaming. I closed my eyes knowing we were going to hit the pavement. Images of our splattered bodies flashed in front of me like a movie but as we neared the ground, about to hit, we didn't. Instead we were flying, jumping from roof top to roof until he found whatever he was seeking and landed with a thud.

Instantly he cast me to the ground, my fingers scraped against wet grass, my clothes absorbing water. My back connected with cold ground and I laid there starring up at the cloudy sky. When it finally registered where we were, I shuddered at the thought of him killing me and throwing my body to the trees.

The park was located at the edge of town, the small forest offering seclusion and isolation. In the past it was the favored place to find people that had gone missing, bodies that where unrecognizable, and the ideal spot for mass murders and junkies.

"Do you plan on lying there all night or you plan on getting up and seeing something that will take your breath away." He growled at me, smiling as he did so. His teeth gleamed in the faint light of the lamp posts making his face contort. It scared me, the way he smiled, the glee that he held in his eyes. Getting up I decided to find out why, so I followed him as he began to move forward. I trailed behind him like a dog, barely keeping up with his quick steps as he walked away from the trees and into the area created for walkers. He stopped, his back straightened and then in a blink of an eye he vanished. I brought my hand up to meet my eyes and wiped at them furiously. I tried to make him reappear, refusing the idea that he had left me once again in the middle of nowhere. Seconds transformed into minutes of me looking in every direction for his lithe form till the soft thud of approaching footsteps forced me to look to my left.

It was a woman, her body petite, and wraped up tightly with a vibrant red coat. Her hair was long, wavy, the pigment a blondish color. I watched her approach and a sense of dread filled.

She didn't even have time to scream. Just like he had done so many times before, he appeared, wrapped his strong hands around her throat, and pulled her close to his body. He titled her head, opening his mouth as he grasped her face, forcing her to stare into his eyes before he ripped her throat open. Blood sprayed everywhere, drops of the vermilion essence landing on my face as her body contorted and he drank.

It was messy, it was fast, and like he said it took my breath away. I couldn't scream, I couldn't move as he retracted his mouth and led her blood run down his chin and throat. Her coat sagged, its surface taking on a darker color as it absorbed her life essence.

"This is what death is, this is all that I am." He told to me, blood still dripping down his front. Droplets of it fell onto his hands as the woman hung there lifeless and in an awkward angle. Her face was etched in shock, her mouth grapping wide as her eyes had already began to glaze over. Finally I fell to my knees, my body shaking, and I begain to cry. My eyes mixed with the red sprinkles of her blood forming bright smearing tracks down my cheeks.

Tears of blood, water of a damned life. The site of her burned into me and I screamed. I brought my fingers to cover my eyes, to hide from everything. My digits slid over my slick cheeks and I felt bile rise at the sensation of slipperiness. I wanted to remain like that, frozen in place, blind to the gruesome scene in front of me. However the blonde Adonis had other plans for me.

Casting the corpse to the ground he dragged me, bruising my hands, and causing me cry harder as he threw me in front of the woman's body. My hands collided with her luke-warm skin and I felt like fainting. The sudden yank of my hair kept me from blacking out as the vampire yanked my head back and grasped my right hand.

"This is what death is" he whispered to me as he pushed my hand down to meet her broken neck. I screamed, I thrashed, and I began to beg. My head was yanked harder and the blonde's voice struck every nerve in my body making me cringe.

"Touch it, feel what it's like. Play with it, mess with it, and see what dying is truly about." He pushed my hand farther into her body, my fingers now submerged in her neck. Blood soaked my fingers, the liquid like corn syrup, sticky and moist.

"NO!" I shrieked, I tried to pull away but the yanking of my neck kept me planted on the ground.

"Touch it!" He screamed and I began to move my fingers. I grasped the veins in her neck, feeling the coarseness of her muscles.

"Oh god, no!" I sputtered as I closed my eyes and played with her inside.

"

"God is not here Shuichi, he's blind to everything that takes place here tonight" He said my name and I cried. Finally he released his hold on me and I fell forward. I pulled myself away from her and stared down at the blood coating my blood. Vainly I tried to wipe them clean on my shirt.

"Finally you can begin to understand, to see what I am and how weak you and your race truly are. You can see why playing foolish games and having dreams is a waste." He turned and began to walk forward into the night. His long coat billowed in the wind and I felt even smaller.

"Why...why me! Why don't you kill me? Why did you show me this?" I called to him, my eyes swollen and my hands still stained.

"Why, why, why! You ask too much!" he screamed and turned back around to face me. I feared him, flinched from the site of him. His eyes were the brightest I had ever seen, the feralness in them hauntingly, the color to striking to look at.

"It's because you weaken me! You infect me with some strange disease that strips me of my skills, of my power, of my very mind. You are the anomaly, you are just another damn question and it sickens me. The mere site of you brings me to my knees and makes me loose control. And without that precious control I am anything but elite!" He snapped at me, his hands lingering in front of me as if he wanted to tear my throat out to. I snapped, finally going over the edge.

"Elite you say! What makes you elite? The fact that you can kill? That your mind is twisted and your soul black. What gives you the right to decide that you're better than us? What gives to the right toy with us so?" I screamed, my throat felt raw and I began to stand. I shook, threatening to fall but I held my ground.

"I am better because I do not hide from reality. I do not run to imaginary beings and pretend that everything is all right and the world isn't a festering waste filled cesspool. I am the thing that everything hides from. I am forsaken. I embrace what I am, what the world truly is, and use everything that I have to survive without hesitation. I am able to see that this world, this place is filled with blood. I know that nothing is worth living for because in the end you end up being swallowed. I am elite because I grasp the gruesomeness of death and use everything imaginable to survive."

"You're a monster." I reply, unable to say anything else.

"Yes, and you and the rest of humanity choose to ignore it! You lock yourself up tight in a ball of fantasy and try desperately to out run reality. To forget that in the end you all are worthless. You hide and therefore I get the right to rip life away from you."

"And what's wrong with that? What's wrong with trying to create a place where you aren't screamed at or look down upon with malice and disgust! What's wrong with trying to be happy! To trying to forget all the damn pain that exists in the world. Open your eyes you say, stop hiding you say. But why! What's wrong with pretending, what's wrong with wanting more! This place, this life that we all live in is filled with nothing but regret and disappointment. It's suffocating. What's wrong with trying to out run it? That a place without….without…." I couldn't finish, I couldn't help but break down.

"You are just like them, the thousands of people that everyday wake up and follow all the rules and continue following the same routine. Living meaningless boring jobs without trying to think about what else there is. Blind to all the truths. The only difference is that you're more creative with your escapement and know that you are running. You are the only one that has looked me in the eyes and has survived. But now you know," he walked to me, he lowered himself to my eye sight and placed his fingers on my lips.

Blood still covered his mouth, his hands…everything. He stared at me, held me in his glaze. "You know what is to happen, what will become of you. My name is Yuki Eiri and you are merely my latest conquest." With that said he sealed my fate, he pressed his lips against mine. A bloody kiss, a kiss that took my breath away.

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	13. Chapter 14

Chapter 14. Shocked Beyond Relief

Warnings: Adult themes, future slash, blood, AU, Vamp Fic

Disclaimer: This is my story! But I do not own Gravitation

Thank you everyone that has reviewed! I hope this chapter is as good as the others! Sorry for the shortness but the next chapter will contain Yuki and Shuichi action. Will Yuki force himself upon Shuichi or will Shuichi find away to escape Yuki's frozen clutches? Please review to find out!

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"So he left you alive," Hiroshi whispered in his ears, words of comfort or so he said. How could anyone find comfort after shoving their hands inside a dead woman's throat? How could anyone find solace when a vampire was stalking them, twisting their dreams into full blown nightmares? How could any living being ever forget the site of blood smeared lips; lips so red, so messy, so coated with fresh splattered blood they were almost surreal. He wanted to die, to let the water of the shower drown him, to cover up the nasty images that tormented him, and wash the blood off his soul. He wanted to pretend, to retreat into his dream world and stay locked up in fairytale where things like that only happened in cliché horror movies. However he couldn't, every thing was tainted.

Instead, all he could do was act like a comatose victim, staring at the tiles of his bathroom floor with no fire or passion in him. He had wanted to wash his hands, to scrub off the smell that coated him like a sticky perfume. Instead he ended up scrapping the skin of his fingers off. Thin, uneven chunks were pulled off like he was ripping off the wings of a fly, disgusting yet entertaining. They had bled, the thin swirls of red slid off his thighs and slithered across the broken tiles. Red, swollen, and stinging he held his mangled hands under the scolding spray of the shower. He had watched, transfixed as the blood swept past him and down the little holes of the drain. Slumping to the floor he stretched his bleeding hands out to play with the dirty water. He stared on horrified as he pressed the pieces of skin through the grating. They didn't quite fit causing him to push harder until they shredded and slip through the opening. He felt like laughing at his achievement but all he could do was shiver. The once burning water had turned into a veil of ice as time had continued moving. He didn't know what hour it was or how long he had been in the compact glass stall. Somehow he knew it didn't matter, he didn't care.

"It could have been worse," Hiro finally said, watching as his only friend carried on like a zombie. He knew the pink haired boy was in shock and he waited for the dam to break.

"And just how could _it _have been any worse Hiroshi! Tell me, could he have killed me because that would have been better than watching that! Killing me… at least I could have understood," He cried, his knees pressing against the cold tiles as he hung his head and screamed. It was painful, watching the death of that woman over and over again in his mind. It was even more soul trenching knowing that the beast had done it simply to make a point. It wasn't basic instinct or means of survival that drove the demon to suck a life away, no it was because he had ticked him off.

"Innocent you say? Just how do you know that? She could have been anyone, a drug dealer, a murderer…." He ticked the words off his fingers like he was going over a shopping list.

"And what difference does it make if she was? She's still dead, I caused her death!" Shuichi closed his eyes and banged his hands against the tile. He wanted to shatter them, to rip everything away. He didn't want to talk, he didn't want to feel.

"Really? So it was you that ripped her throat open. Yes I'd forgotten you grew fangs last night, silly me how could I forget! Listen Shuichi the only one responsible for that woman's death was _that _vampire."

"Still!"

"Still nothing! You did nothing wrong! So what if he's fixed on you! If it wasn't that woman then it could have been another. What did you think a vampire did? Sucked champagne and ate caviar."

"No….its just… I was so lost in the way my body responded to him that I forget how vampires…"

"Eat?" Hiro offered gently, gripping Shuichi's shoulders and forcing him to turn the water off. The cold air that was present in the apartment nipped at the boy's skin causing his back to arch. Nervously he stood up, goose bumps erupting across his creamy skin as he pulled back the shower curtain and headed for his bedroom. He shivered as he reached for clothes, quickly dressing. Sliding his shirt on, he shot a hasty glance towards his window. It was closed now, the glass covered up with tape and the curtains stapled to the walls. It was a feeble attempt at security, at safety.

"Yes….maybe, maybe I still didn't believe that he was a vampire. I think that because he was so human looking I forgot that he really was a monster. Maybe…I wanted….i don't know what I wanted!" He fell onto his bed as he shrieked, pulling his thin blanket up to his lips, as he crawled into a fetal position. Six hours had passed since the incident, since he felt the insides of a woman. His mind was still reeling and he doubted if it would ever stop.

"What a way to make you grow up quick" he whispered to Hiro angrily as he pressed his eyes shut and tried to will the incident away. I didn't work.

The memory of freezing lips laced with coppery blood, the soft yet somehow rock hard folds of skin pressing against his was vivid in his mind. The sensation he felt as they pressed against his was electrifying. It was as he was being burned alive from the inside out. The heat that had radiated from the corpse was magnifying and left him feeling disgusted and excited. He had fainted, his lips still tingling and his eyes a wide in shock before he lapsed into darkness. The image of stained golden melting in front of him and conversing into a black ball was forced him over the edge and caused him to feel into unconsciousness.

Hours later he woke to find himself in his apartment, the window open, and the vampire no where to be seen. His head was pounding, his body shaking, and the sense that something important had happened thrummed throughout his body. He had tried then, to recall the night's events but was answered only with blackness. He remembered the frustration then he had felt at not being able remember. The images just on the tip of his tongue, just out of his reach. He grasped for them and they slipped through his fingers. That was when he glanced down at his hands and felt the blood drain from his face.

Dried, coated, and splashed with a flaking red substance he began to panic and wring his wrists like a spider was crawling over them. He began to question, to berate why they were encrusted in faded, blackish red. To him it looked like he had dipped them in fruit punch, smeared them in corn syrup, and painted them with black. All he could do was stare, as his memory returned and he went numb. His eyes began to swirl around in his sockets, his mind growing more frantic as he surveyed his body. He took in the site of his haggard appearance, of the state of his clothes. He barely remembered screaming, he knew he had committed the act but the sound never entered his ears. He was too lost in the remembrance of blood sliding over his wrists, his fingers grasping the torn remnants of a jugular.

His mind began to melt, images twisting in his head as he flung himself off his bed and raced to his window. He had slammed it shut, the glass vibrating from the force he had used. He began to destroy his room then, flipping furniture over in the search of something to seal it up. He had found tape, staples, and a sense of urgency as he covered every speck of glass with silver duck tape.

Afterwards his body relaxed, his breathing calmed and his mind was set to pause. Somehow his feet led him to his bathroom and the sink was turned on. The water rushed forth and he waited until the basin was filled. Turning off the water, he stared at his appearance imprinted on the waters surface before breaking that picture by slamming in head into the sink. His lungs begged for air as water flowed into him and Hiro awoke from his slumber and began screaming at him. He had listened, listened to screams before it all became too much and he pulled back. Grasping for air he fell to the floor, water dripping from his hair and chin as he coughed.

Hiro was seething, ranting at him for trying to kill himself. However it wasn't long before he calmed and took in Shuichi's distorted behavior. He couldn't remember the words Hiro had cooed into his ears as he started the shower and climbed in. All he knew was that for the first time in years he was scared for his life and that Hiro wouldn't be able to help him. He couldn't take his own life, Hiro wouldn't allow. That was not how his life would be extinguished. No, death would come from the searing kiss of walking corpse.

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	14. Chapter 15

Chapter 15. Mind Tricks Are Stunning

Disclaimer: I do not own gravitation but I do own this story!

Warnings: mature themes, vamp fic, Au, slash, angst

Thanks everyone for reviewing. I have decided that once I finish this story that I would like to publish it. I'll change the names of my characters and give Shuichi more of a background. Since this is an original storyline the only thing that ties it gravitation this the characters name and appearances.

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A smile twisted his lips, his eyes dancing with the shadows made from the candle's flame. Submerged in the darkness, the vampire smirked. A slip of mirth and amusement played on his face as he stared into the omnipresent blackness. A sense of purpose, of distorted happiness, flowed over him and twisted his mind into such a state of euphoria that even the lightest pressure forced upon his skin caused him to shudder. Grasping his head, his fingers twirled around in his honey like locks. He thrashed his head around and around until he could take it no longer. He was forced to press his back against the decaying wall and deliriously summon his memory. His fingers touched its crumbling, cracked surface and his vision flared into scrotching orange, hazy yellow, and spiraling vermillion.

Bright images danced before his eyes, as he tilted his head back until it connected with the warped wood. Closing his amber eyes, he savored the sensations that crept along his spine. It was a tickling emotion, fleeting, flirtatiously elusive and somewhat mind clearing that urged his press down harder, rougher. Draw the memory up, the moment that he screamed, the second that everything was silenced. Draw it up or remember something else.

He pursed his lips together, his teeth sliding over the cracks in his lips, tracing the outlines of their boundaries. A low, rumbling noise echoed along the inner chamber of his throat as he released a deep moan. Saturating and attention grabbing, the deep, throaty sound aroused his body even further. It fueled the tingling emotion that had seized control of his limbs and caused his back to arch in forgotten memories. Pressing his perfect fingers against the wall, he shuddered, and slid the cold digits against the barren wood. Inside his mind he was dancing, marveling in the sensations created from watching one bloody scene replay over and over again.

In his perfect fanasty, his marred version of reality, he was theb only thing that mattered. Absolute control, how desirably. So lost in his illusion of perfection, he was not expecting the condemning voice that belong to his own mind to force him out of his pleasure.

"Like what you see Eiri? You're in an ecstatic mood tonight. What, toying with the weak and powerless suddenly become even more…delicious?" It was a whisper, a soft murmur against his ear that caused him to open his eyes. He lifted his head and frowned. The familiar tickling sensation ghosted over his body and he conversed. His malicious happiness disappeared and he was left bathed in illfitted anger. Feeling a cold wave of numbness, not unfamilar and alarming, he knew that the little voice inside his head had decided to come out and play. Annoyance ran throughout his body at his wasted high, as his mind betrayed him and the voice inside him floated to the surface.

He bite down, his teeth sinking into his soft tongue as pressure was exerted upon his spine; a warning to reply to the question given. He gave no answer, no response, no whimper of pain and disappointment. Oh how he would have loved to have cried out. But, instead he told himself that he would not be toyed with like a child would a puppet or a doll. He would not allow a mind trick to overcome him. Instead he decided to forgo answering, wait until the voice pished him to the opening of his edges.

"Playing the silent game won't drive me away but I bet if you stick out you're tongue and call me a meanie I might decide to go hide in the closet" The taunt was delivered, the words causing the vampire to bristle and a growl into silence through the darkness. Scrunching his face up, he let out a sneer at the childish behavior. His mouth twisted into an ugly expression and he knew that he would have to answer or receive a headache. His eyes roamed the veiled room until they locked upon burning red. Lifting his hand he waved the appendage causing the candle's flame to flicker before transforming into a wisp of smoke.

"How intelligent, I suppose reverting back to childish slurs is supposed to invoke some sort of anger in me? And Yes I was enjoying the memory of my "meal" last night." He taunted back, rising to the challenge that his mind had presented to him. He would not lie, he would not try to hide his feeling for what he had done. Last night's feeding was a work of art, a perfectly performed play. He had prided himself in the simple look o horror that had been displayed in the boys eyes. He marveled in the way the boy shivered as he awaited the impending diaster with uncertaintly. The look had been mesmerising. It was enough to thrill him to the point of performing truly herendios acts.

"Yes of course that was it. Or is it that you're happy simply because you think you've regained something. It's a sad site when you have to purposely destroy a human's mind just to feel stable." His mind replied, a sinister smirked forming in the back of his crania. The vampire tensed at the response, his anger rising at the accusations it held.

"Still enjoying the tramutizing situations you create from fooling around with humans? are you that uncreative that you have to get your hands bloody simply to surpress a memory. How absolutely fanstastic of you Eiri. "

"And just what would you know, if I decided to strip the land clean and bathe in a waterfall of blood simply because I have a desire for it then I will. No….human will ever get the better of me, especially one that talks to himself!" He spat the words from his tongue like hot venom, his lips barring back to expose his elongated teeth. He answered the unasked question, the sentence that his mind was dying to ask. It all revolved around that human.

"Yes and what you're doing is so much different." A laugh echoed inside of him, a rumbling at the back of his mind ghosted over his head causing him to shudder in rage. Reaching up he gripped the sides of his head and pressed inwards. The pressure, the force stung and the laughter subsided and a hiss echoed forth. Dual punishment, one sided revenge.

"It figures…..I have a little bit of fun and you appear to berate me, what got tired of watching from the side lines?" The vampire sneered as the hissing came to a soft whisper. He wanted to be left alone, he wanted to destroy the questions that where being thrown at him.

"Hn, I have no reason to be envious of you Eiri, look around you. You are worn, you are defeated, and you are unraveling. The once powerful vampire is coming undone. That fact alone brings me much amusement. You're at your wits ends and you have no idea how to save yourself." The last part was cooed in a soft tone, his mind taunting him, making him seethe with undefined rage at the thought that the things his other self said might possess some meaning of truth.

"And just why do you think that! Did you not see me last night, the things I did, the things I've done. I am no different than when I first became this walking….abomination. I am not the one that is coming undone, I am not the one that is pressed into a corner." What he said, the things that he told himself were true. A part of him believing them at least. He was not conquered, he was not becoming undone by a human.

"Really….then tell me, why does that mortal still possess a heart beat. Why haven't you ripped his throat out and be done with the whole mess….. Why are you hissing to the dark ? What makes this one any different than all the rest that you have killed?"

"And just where's the fun in that?" The vampire exclaimed, snarling into the dark. His hands clenched, his body tensing as he stood and paced the room. The floorboards creaked, the wood screaming at the pressure descending upon it. He was alone, he was covered in darkness, and he was in the one place that brought him turbulent peace. His sanctuary, his piece of hell, the building that he had shared with that human.

"I think I know why-"

" I bet you do! And let me guess its some….unspeakable tirade of how I can't kill that damn human because I'm afraid!" He growled, the noise bouncing of the marred walls and returning to him. He walked, stepping over broken glass and floors boards until he reached left the room that he was in and entered another one. This room was smaller, the walls holding no windows. Very little filth littered the floor as he took one giant sweep of the place with his eyes and continued moving forward. Going to the very end of the room he found a door and grasped the rusted copper doorknob. The door creaked, the wood barely opening as he pulled it forward and came face to face with the base of a flight stairs. Grasping the railing, he fingers slid over scarred wood, the grain worn and coarse. His nails traced each indention as he slowly ascended the stairs. Each step creaked, the wood shaking as he took his time until finally reaching the second floor landing.

"Hn, close. You got the afraid part right Eiri. If you aren't then why after 50 years have you returned to this place. Why are you back in this city, are you hiding from the memory of everything!" His mind screamed, the noise echoing against the sides of his skull and for one moment his vision blurred.

"Because it is my choice…..because other wise I am anything but- " He was cut off, his words falling short. He stood on the landing, his eyes starring into a narrow hallway. Shaking his head he moved forward, his feet sliding over faded newspaper, his body passing door after door until he reach the end of the path. In front of him stood a door, its handle no longer present, its wooden surface scratched and rotting. The number 17 hung from one nail, its surface encrusted with rust.

"Elite! Yes that was a dazzling speech you delivered last night but that's not it and you know it. The truth is, that when you strip everything away, all that you are you're left with is nothing. You have no place, no purpose, and that scares you more than anything. You are terrified that when you finally crack you won't know what to do."

"I fear nothing! Enough! All you offer is speculation. Foolish words that are meant to make me flustered. You are nothing more than a voice inside my head, and I am tired of your presence! I know my place, I know what I am, and I embrace every minute of it. This…this is simply a trying time, a period when I am damned with the images of my past, and the memory of what that man has done to me. I am troubled with that and nothing more. I am in control and I have no need for you!"

He moved forward, his hand pushing the door open until it revealed its innards. Stepping into the room his mind fell silent, his voice becoming lost, almost as if no words could reach him now. His mind cried, images sprung forth and he surveyed the room's contents with a rejected grimace. Held inside these four walls was everything he hated, everything he longed to forget. Closing the door behind him he allowed his movie to play, for his memories to run, and for sharp, asphyxiated regret to seize him. Just as the pressure in his skull lessened, his mind pressed against his eyes and whispered one last sentence to him.

"Perhaps what you have finally come to realize Eiri… is that eternity really is forever and you can't stand to continue just as you until time has truly stopped."

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"How long are you going to hide in here Shuichi?" Hiroshi was angry, his voice crackling as he screamed at the youth. Lingering in the back of the fluorescent haired's mind he urged the boy to speak. However, all he received was the faint hum of the fan turning up above. Tossing his head back he groaned and thought about his current situation. The one that was clear to him was that his charge was annoyingly stubborn. Something that would never change.

It had started out as a simple conversation, a way for him to coax the broken boy out of his shell, to help him live. Instead he received scared whispers, hushed tones, and fearful eyes. It angered him to no end, causing him to become flustered and his eyes to flash dangerously.

"You can't let him do this to you Shuichi! You're better than this, you're stronger than this!" Sighing Hiroshi caved, abandoning his quest to scare away the boy's fears. Leaving him to his own devices he sat and contemplative a way to make the wayward boy open up. Groaning once again he stared at the covered back of the youth. Shuichi had encased himself in blankets and buried his face from his site.

"You're going to have to come out sometime you know!" He received no response once again. Grunting he thought about pouncing on the bed and ripping the blanket away from the boy's form. He thought about shaking the brat until he cried and finally listened to what Hiroshi had to say.

"It's not like you're doing anything better…." He replied to the cocoon of pink hair, the strawberry tresses were splashed against his pillow. Sighing he float through the blanket's thin material and took note of Shuichi's current state. Huddled in a feeble nest of security, the youth laid shivering. The cold tore at his skin, caressing his body, and make him hug his sides. A cold vine crept against his heart as he fought off the frightening fingers of sleep. Inside he begged for release, for his heart to stop breaking, and for his mind to quit quivering.

He wanted to hide, to never let the warm rays of the sun fall across his skin. He wanted to forget, to believe that he was insane. That instead of some twisted, feeding frenzy that he was forced to participate in…. he was really just trapped in a disturbed nightmare. However, despite Hiroshi's babying he wasn't naïve. He knew that wishing was a useless joke, nothing would change reality. Everything was real, monsters existed, and he was condemned to being a demon's plaything. He had nothing left, he was already dead.

"At least think of the bills. If you can't afford to pay the rent to this….lavish penthouse sweet…. then you're ass is out on the streets!"

"So what….." Shuichi mumbled, pulling back his blankets and staring at his duck taped window. A shiver struck him, the sensation causing his stomached to turn and his skin to tingle like a spider was skating across his back.

"I'm a ward of the state and being stalked by a fucking vampire Hiroshi! What could possibly be worse? Besides… a paper box is better than this place anyway….." He grumbled, sticking out his bottom lip and pouting. Extending his front teeth, he ranked them across his plumb lip, his mind becoming heavy with thought as he shrugged his back. In front of him his vision twisted and Hiro appeared to him. Instantly the brunette began pacing, his hands moving with him as he lunged about the room. His wild his face contorted into a scrawl as he scolded him.

"Yes, but a paper box can't protect you from that big bad vampire" Hiroshi mocked, slapping his hands together, and urging Shuichi to move. Shuichi half expected him to say up and at them.

"Still Hiroshi its all the same….how can you expect me to continue like nothing happened knowing that I'm living on borrowed time….." He closed his eyes, blocking the screams that echoed his mind. His ears throbbed as the tried to ignore the imaginary voice of the woman that he never got to hear, the silent scream that was never ushered into the night, the repeating gasp of shock that haunted him. Inside him the vampire's words boomed repeating over and over until he felt like he might faint.

"So you're just going to wait and until he comes back for you is that it? Wait until the sun disappears over the horizon and he comes to rip the tape off the window? You're just going to let him take you, no struggle, no emotion, no fight? What happened to the words you said last night! What happened to messing with death!

"Death messed back! He did exactly what you said he would do and the price was something I never wanted to see. You were right, you're always right…." Shuichi trailed off his, voice growing soft and losing all emotion, as his eyes glazed over and he took on the appearance of a broken doll. His body went limp and thoughts of being split open by frozen fingers played hop scotch inside him. His hands began to shake as he picture perfect lips drenched in blood, his pink hair matted and his head thrown back and listless. Suddenly the meaning of death and his own foolishness sunk in. He was going to die, he was going to be killed just like that woman, and no one was going to care. He was going to die and all for the amusement of some creature that he couldn't even begin to fathom.

In front of him Hiroshi stopped his pacing and took in the emotions that flashed across Shuichi's face. Starring down at the quivering human, he felt his anger rise and he was swallowed up in rage. Almost immediately Shuichi's head shot up, his eyes glassy, his face puffy and red. He stared into Hiro's hardened eyes and began to shake even more. For the first time in almost six years Hiroshi was truly angry with him.

"Are you so stupid that you will just stay in this room and allow death, allow him to claim you!" Hiroshi seemed to explode, as he glared down at him with black eyes. The stare was unraveling, penetrating and upset Shuichi more than the vampire's ever did.

"Are you that pathetic Shuichi?" Somehow hearing the question asked by Hiroshi made him cringe even more. Throughout his life Shuichi had been asked that, been mocked, and ridiculed. He was used to it, used to pretending and ignoring, but not once had Hiroshi dared to ask him the same question with same amount of rage and anger as everyone else. It cut him deeply and for a moment he forgot about the vampire, forgot about the woman. Instead he was filled with pain of a different kind, a type that scared him more than having to touch a bleeding throat.

"Please Hiroshi, what do you expect me-----" He tried to cry, to let him other self know his pain but he never out the sentence out.

"I expect you to grow a back bone and act like you're alive! Other wise it's all over, other wise everything we have been through has been for nothing!"

"Hiroshi! You know that it's not true! You know that I -----" Again he was cut off, Hiroshi's deeper voice silencing him as the brunette towered over his form and screamed at him with such fury that Shuichi wished he had never created him.

"You know what Shuichi? You're conquered, you're defeated, you're that creature's plaything and you know it! You have become all the things that you fought so hard not to be." His voice seemed too softened his face contorting into a grimace as he lowered his eyes and stared at the pink haired boy's shaking hands. For a moment Hiroshi allowed the past to claim him and the memories of his early existence came flooding into him.

"You're exactly as they said you would turn out. Weak, desperate, and wishing for death." Hiroshi closed his eyes as Shuichi hid his from view. " And I have had enough!"

"I never thought that after all we been through, after all we went through just to gain this," Hiroshi opened his eyes and waved his hand in the air. Before him Shuichi peeked through the cracks of his fingers. His heart dropping with each word that Hiroshi muttered. "Much freedom. After all I've seen you overcome just for you to turn into this. You were passionate, you had fire! And now look, only after spending a few days with that man you're suddenly perfectly content to just sit around and die." By now the anger had faded from Hiroshi's voice. Hiroshi stared at Shuichi listlessly, his eyes betraying all of his disappointment.

"What happened to my Shuichi? What happened to the boy that refused to cry? Refused to settle for the abuse that surrounded him." Shuichi shook before pulling his hands away from his eyes. Lifting his head up, he locked Hiroshi's obsidian orbs with his and let out a shaky sentence. He knew everything Hiroshi said was true and he accepted it with stride.

"That Shuichi is no longer here. All that is left is me and…. I am at my wits end. This situation is different than the ones in the past. Its something that brings everything into perspective and forces me to give up childhood wishes and ideals…..it forces me to accept my fate without fighting. "He did not look down or hide his head in shame. Instead he stared into Hiroshi's infinite black pools and saw the same loneliness, the same oppressive darkness that the vampire's golden eyes held. He was drowning in that smothering color, begging for release as they wrapped themselves around him. He was so transfixed with the images he saw in them that he didn't expect to feel Hiroshi's hand striking him. He stumbled back against his head board, his cheek burning with invisible pain as he stared down his own mind, his own twisted image.

"No its not! Everything is the same, the solution is still the same. All you have to do Shuichi is find the right path to it." Again Hiroshi's hand descended upon his cheek. Though there was no stinging pain, no malicious, or hate. Lovingly, he stroked the spot were he had attacked and caressed it with a gentle hand. There was no hint of rage as he stared into his charge's violent, violet eyes and slowly soothed all his pain away.

"But how?" Shuichi whispered, holding Hiroshi's hand and believing every word. With large eyes he hung onto everything Hiroshi said just like a child would do with their parent. Removing his hand from the boy's face, Hiroshi pushed him against the bed and cradled him like a lover would.

"I have a plan," he smirked, cooing into the boy's ear and then with a chaste kiss he flowed back inside Shuichi.

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_December 28, 1889_

_Someone help me. Tell me that sky does not rain fire, that the images that assault my mind and burn through my closed eyes are false. Implore to me that my mind is crippled, destroyed and feeble and that everything I see is nothing more than as hallucination. Tell me that I'm locked in some cruel farce of a nightmare. Please, someone kill me._

_I have no sense of time, no sense of being. I am locked forever in blue darkness and my body burns with a painful touch of fire. I am drowning I know it! It has been days since I have seen the sun, felt my skin without fear or revulsion. It has been days…..since that man has touched me._

_For the first time in years I am filled with that childhood fear. Filled with an anger and hate that is strong it threatens to destroy me. I was foolish! I know that! I know that! But please, someone, don't let this beast claim me…..don't let this night continue on forever. For I fear it, I fear the things that are hidden in it and the voice that presses against my skin and whispers its desires to me. It sings horrible songs and implants images inside my mind. It is slowly driving me insane, it is slowly but surely picking me apart and I fear that it does not stop I shall no longer exist……_

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Gold eyes traced the curve of each word, staring at the scratchy worn writing until he could take no more and threw the book that held the passage against the wall. It fell to the floor a few pages, their surfaces yellow and stiff escaped from frayed thick spine of the little black book. Screaming he grasped the nearest object to his form, a small leather chair that was encrusted with dust it upholstery uplifting and half eaten way by time and moths, and threw it. It crashed against the wall, wooden splinters flying everywhere and a thin layer of dust filled the room. The air tasted stale, lifeless, like paper.

Breathing in the dead air the vampire threw the decaying door that lead in and out of the small room into the hallway and rushed down the stair. Flinging himself into the parlor, he approached one of the cracked windows and appeared out upon the hills surrounding the house. A warm crimson and violet hued blanket coated the hills turning the grass into a glowing mass of orange and yellow as the sun began to set.

" What are you going to do Eiri? Seek out that little human and torment him even more?" His mind watched him with a fixed amusement as he waited until darkness covered the once glowing hills. A sense of urgency, of raw terror filled him as he waited until the night came alive and extended it claws to cover everything. Gripping his hands he savored the sensation of his nails piercing his skin. A small shiver, a little curling tendril of release floated through him and it caused his mind to clear and anger to amplify.

"No I want to do something that's even more fun" He said and laughed into the darkness, his blood dripping onto the already stained wood of his house.


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